You're a burglar, but....

[Archie_tect]

Not for the last few decades

? Confused of .com
I love my little left and right click + scroll wheel mouse... hate trackpads and touch screen laptops. Takes far too long when working on CAD.

On that note- pinch someone's USB2 to USB-C adapter... ha!

 

[VelvetUnderpants]

Replace the stylus on the record player for a self-tapping screw.

 

[classic33]

The fuses from the electrical plugs.

The outside door.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

The curtains

 

[Beebo]

Shower head.

or bike related, gear cables so they are either in top or bottom gear. Not sure which would be worse.

 

[Beebo]

The round plate out of the microwave.

We smashed our glass plate. It was cheaper to buy a new microwave than get a replacement plate, and they are all different.

 

[Dayvo]

Mix some dry cement with the sand in the kiddies’ sand box.
Come the next rainfall they’ll have a nice concreted area to play in.

 

[lane]

There was a radio 4 play with someone who did similar - most effective I thought was she stole someone's glasses.

 

[LCpl Boiled Egg]

Any corkscrews and bottle openers.

 

[PeteXXX]

The oven shelves

 

[slow scot]

Front door mat.

 

[winjim]

Rizla.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Turn the electricity off at the meter

 

[bagpuss]

The tomato ketchup out the fridge, whilst leaving the bacon behind .

 

[Arrowfoot]

Can opener.