OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
The Auberge Field from Chris Rea's TURDIS is responsible for Donald Trump's unusual combover.
True Facts About Chris Rea
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
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grldtnr
Über Member
The malfunctional Porta potty is entirely responsible for Donald Trump's unexplainable election triumph.
America will rue the day Chris managed to Wang over the Porta potty on the Starter handle......surely Chris ought to have realized the TURDIS is a turkey, and should have lunched it in favour of the time Transit,.
But you know how it is is old buggers like to get crocks of shite to run , even if we know we will be spending more time under it with our bag of spanners trying to keep it going!
America will rue the day Chris managed to Wang over the Porta potty on the Starter handle......surely Chris ought to have realized the TURDIS is a turkey, and should have lunched it in favour of the time Transit,.
But you know how it is is old buggers like to get crocks of shite to run , even if we know we will be spending more time under it with our bag of spanners trying to keep it going!
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DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c0rne2d540lo
In Brazil, a former city councillor has been accused of removing a toilet bowl & 2 sinks from her office after losing her attempt at reelection, Janaina Lima claims she paid for them out of her own pocket, but was caught on film removing them from her Sao Paulo Office, claiming she intended to donate them to the chamber, however the chamber she is actually referring to is her own Turdis build, having got wind of Chris Rea's machine, but she has cancelled plans to build a time travelling potty after being caught acquiring the luxury bathroom furniture illegally, and has returned the Portable plastic potty to Sistemas sanitários pesados de São Paulo for a refund, unfortunately in English that translates to Sao Paulo heavy duty toilet systems, or S.H.I.T.S for short, Chris Rea was not available for comment.
In Brazil, a former city councillor has been accused of removing a toilet bowl & 2 sinks from her office after losing her attempt at reelection, Janaina Lima claims she paid for them out of her own pocket, but was caught on film removing them from her Sao Paulo Office, claiming she intended to donate them to the chamber, however the chamber she is actually referring to is her own Turdis build, having got wind of Chris Rea's machine, but she has cancelled plans to build a time travelling potty after being caught acquiring the luxury bathroom furniture illegally, and has returned the Portable plastic potty to Sistemas sanitários pesados de São Paulo for a refund, unfortunately in English that translates to Sao Paulo heavy duty toilet systems, or S.H.I.T.S for short, Chris Rea was not available for comment.
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Chris Rea warms up his hands before a gig by repeatedly removing and replacing Marathon plus tyres without the use of levers.
craigwend
Grimpeur des terrains plats
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Chris Rea is depressed. Christmas is over and his investment from 2002, when he purchased the Millennium Dome, has once again failed to turn a profit.
Still, he tries to remain optimistic and is once again making plans for a thriving dome for Christmas.
Still, he tries to remain optimistic and is once again making plans for a thriving dome for Christmas.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea has leopard skin seat covers in the TURDIS.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea is not aware that Green Shield stamps are the origin of Argos.
Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
The Auberge field is currently malfunctioning over SW England.
lazybloke
Ginger biscuits and cheddar
- Location
- Leafy Surrey
Too little, too late.
If he wears a colander on his head for his next music video, i might forgive him.
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Chris Rea has signed a deal to become the new face of Damart thermal underwear.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
You may have seen on You Tube, advertisements for a "Gentleman's Salt Trick" apparently it wasn't invented by a Harvard Professor,but was discovered by Chris Rea after a bumpy ride in The Turdis, he had purchased Fish & Chips for a Friday treat whilst travelling through time when a burp in the auberge field spilt his Salt & Vinegar, Can of Irn Bru & tomato ketchup in his nether regions, the resulting swelling meant Chris couldn't exit The Turdis for 7 hours, without drawing attention to himself, however Mrs Rea was very impressed (allegedly!)
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
The government have refused to launch an enquiry into Chris Rea's time fiddling.
