Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
Chris Rea won the milk race 5 years in a row. However when it was found he’d been using performance enhancing skimmed milk. He was struck from the records.
True Facts About Chris Rea
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
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OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea was due to play the part of the Sheriff of Nottingham in Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves, but he refused to shave his goatee and wear a stunt beard so the part went to Alan Rickman.
Moon bunny
Judging your grammar
- Location
- Basking in my own brilliance.
Chris Rea lubricates his cycle chains with WD40, we, the mighty Chris Rea's disciples, must do likewise.
Gwylan
Veteran
- Location
- All at sea⛵
That's chainism, I have a belt and feel marginalised by this sort of talk.🫢
For clarity, on my bike and my trousers
It's a little known fact that Chris Rea is responsible for the whistling harmonies on The Scorpions number one hit record, Wind of Change.
Whilst sat in the studio struggling for inspiration they were fortunate that next door Chris Rea was also recording, and after a night on the Bock, which he used to wash down the saurkraut and bratwurst, he was playing an unusual high pitched tune on the bowel bugle.
In that instant the spark of creativity was ignited.
Whilst sat in the studio struggling for inspiration they were fortunate that next door Chris Rea was also recording, and after a night on the Bock, which he used to wash down the saurkraut and bratwurst, he was playing an unusual high pitched tune on the bowel bugle.
In that instant the spark of creativity was ignited.
Moon bunny
Judging your grammar
- Location
- Basking in my own brilliance.
L
I took, was once a cyclist without a chain, but feeling left out of the chain lubrication threads, asked the mighty Chris Rea for advice. "Buy a Bicycle with a chain" was the advice from Chris Rea.
I took, was once a cyclist without a chain, but feeling left out of the chain lubrication threads, asked the mighty Chris Rea for advice. "Buy a Bicycle with a chain" was the advice from Chris Rea.
Moon bunny
Judging your grammar
- Location
- Basking in my own brilliance.
Pete xxx steals the crusts from Chris Rea's sandwiches.
lazybloke
Priest of the cult of Chris Rea
- Location
- Leafy Surrey
The lunchbox was invented by Chris Rea as a security device to protect the integrity of his sarnies.
It's a little-known fact that music has not been a commercial success for Rea. Instead, he made his fortune by licensing his lunchbox technology to Linford Christie.
It's a little-known fact that music has not been a commercial success for Rea. Instead, he made his fortune by licensing his lunchbox technology to Linford Christie.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea invented GT85 as a beard-friendly vegetarian alternative to WD40.
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Like many musicians, Chris Rea is very superstitious. For example he always wears three socks - two on one foot and one on the other. He alternates between his left and right feet wearing two socks. Except for Sundays when he wears zero, four or six socks.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
Chris Rea entered the inaugural Britains Got Talent, he got through to the final but sadly came second to a Sticky Vicky tribute act from Rhyl
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea works nights making deliveries for Pizza Hut.
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
I'm surprised to hear that, given Chris Rea's extreme mushroom allergy. I hope he uses latex gloves.
