Chris Rea has a new project, a remake of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, where the Time Transit will be the star, Chitty Chitty Bang Van, in order to make the film stand out, he has been out in the Turdis recruiting famous actors of the past, Chris will be Caractacus Rea, and he has lined up 1950’s Diana Dors as Truly Scrumptious, Alf Garnett as his dad, Grandpa Rea, and Brian Blessed as Lord Scrumptious, however the parts of Baron and Baroness Bomburst have caused huge problems, as somehow both Adolf Hitler & Benito Mussolini had found out about the film due to various time travel incursions into WW2, and both wanted the part, accompanied by Eva Braun and Rachele Guidi respectively as the Baroness, believing it would improve their public image, this lead to a huge fall out where Benito told Adolf to get out of Italy, and changed sides to the Allies, and in further controversy he has cast Jacob Rees Mogg as the kid catcher, and Roy “Chubby” Brown as the toy maker, he is also hoping to use the Turdis to send Alf Garnett off to Vulgaria singing the song Posh (plastic outside shoot house). Chris is hoping to have the final cast members on board soon, and the script and screen play finalised
