Things you'd like to say, but can't

[ColinJ]

"Steer right"

"STEER RIGHT"

"THAT'S LEFT"

"Never mind ...!"

(That was actually caused by the local Boxing Day flood of 2015 which caused the canal to overfill and flood down into the river below.)

 

[fimm]

No, those showers are not "Well used".
Out of 100+ people in this office, 2 hardcore commuters plus 3 - 4 more occasional cyclists is not "a lot" of cyclists.
Stupid female

 

[Salad Dodger]

What do you mean, you don't know anything about these 2 patients turning up for treatment? They are both written in the diary. The appointments diary. The big paper folder one. For today. Look. There. See?
I am only on relief here, and have no access to NHS patient records, so it's hardly surprising that I didn't transfer these appointments to your laptop. Just like I didn't for all of the 6 months that I was on relief here over the Winter, when everybody used the big paper folder diary and managed to be prepared for patients.
So maybe it's just you that is a wally........

 

[fossyant]

Here is a good one.

When you come to me and ask advice and you say that you can't be bothered with checking 'right to work' for a "Festival Event" that you are running, and want us to pay a "Charitable Trust" to pay performers and artists instead of us? When I say things like HMRC rules, IR35 rules, you must check they can work in the UK, then I tell you that what you are proposing breaks all our Financial Regs, as well as HMRC stuff. I also use words like 'illegal' and 'it's like money laundering' just to emphasise the seriousness.

You then you go to one of the project administrators and ask them to set up a contract with said Trust, despite what I said, you have just dug yourself in a big hole of poo. My colleague talks to me ! You are now a whole pile of trouble you sneaky little ####. The fact that this sort of thing is a disciplinary !

You do stuff like this all the time, you've really dug a hole as two people in the office heard me tell you. So when you say 'I didn't understand' or 'I didn't hear you' you are lying. Call yourself an intelligent 'academic'.

 

[Speicher]

I think you should stop saying that you are an Electrical Engineer.

You did not realise that you were using the wrong remote control to switch on the television. There was a choice of two, so I can confidently say that you need a competence assessment. Especially as it did not occur to you that you could be using the wong tool, and just decided that the television is broken.

 

[Bromptonaut]

Do you really think a visit to Olivanders wand shop was part of my induction to Citizens Advice?

 

[Lullabelle]

You are claiming for what? I take it you are drinking and smoking away your pension and decided to try and con a few extra quid to top up. Good luck.

 

[fossyant]

MIL rant !

You can use a phone properly and leave a reasonably coherent message. Please don't phone up everyone in the family (Friday evening everyone is out or not sitting with a phone to our ears as we may be watching a movie) and leave a message like "I am stuck"

WTF given your regular falls don't start a major panic. Cue, panicked checks on the web cam, we couldn't see you. Then phone and find out you haven't fallen or got stuck. Your walking stick had been placed a foot or so further from the bed than you like and you won't even try to get it. Fortunately, nephew round the corner was in and came round and moved it closer.

A walking stick not quite in the right place is not a "I am stuck" message left on phones. You've got 3 or 4 other sticks that you could have used. You aren't helping your case to want to stay at home rather than in care.

 

[Speicher]

I am informing you that if Miss Smarty Pants telephones me, I will be sending her in your direction. I had enough of her last time around, when she wanted everything done yesterday.

 

[Mrs M]

 

[Nigel-YZ1]

In that advert why is Mr Wiggins driving purposely towards the dead end of the service road of the Derwent Reservoir?

 

[TVC]

In that advert why is Mr Wiggins driving purposely towards the dead end of the service road of the Derwent Reservoir?

I thought that's where he was, and what has he done to his hair?

 

[ianrauk]

 

[RoubaixCube]

So you made me wait over 3 weeks to have my holiday approved, HAD ANOTHER MANAGER TELL ME HE HAD APPROVED IT YESTERDAY, then you message me earlier this morning telling me you cant approve my holiday??

I try to call you but its so f**king damned convenient that youre in a 'meeting' so cant take my call but can still message me about 5 times in 15mins and tell me to 'have patience'????

This is not acceptable... I waited over 3 weeks to have 3 days booked holiday (which works out im off for a week due to my shift pattern)

 

[ColinJ]

View attachment 352732

Sorry ... How about 'Weak and Wobbly' then?