The Limerick Thread

[Drago]

There was a young stud called Accy,
Who was addicted to smoking the baccy,
He'd roll up a smoke,
And then have a good toke,
And he'd give give the dog ends to his lackey.

 

[Drago]

There was a young lass named Reynard,
Who's outlook on life was quite hard,
She'd stay out all night,
Drink beer and start fights,
Then eat a kebab cooked in lard.

 

[Reynard]

There was a young lass named Reynard,
Who's outlook on life was quite hard,
She'd stay out all night,
Drink beer and start fights,
Then eat a kebab cooked in lard.

I *do* use lard to cook with but sadly, I'm teetotal.

Am more a stay up and read all night kind of girl.

Thanks for the giggle tho, me old bean xxx

 

[twentysix by twentyfive]

There once was a chap called Rea
Who went out on stage with fea(r)
He sang with aplomb
And went down like a bomb
But not with anyone with ea(r)

 

[screenman]

A cyclist sped down a steep hill,
With legs full of power and skill.
He zoomed past a car,
Felt like a bright star,
Then promptly took a fine spill!

 

[Drago]

There was a young man named Keir,
Who the wealthy fat donors loved dear,
They'd pay for his suits,
And he'd lick all their boots,
And the papers did use this to smear.


The was a young cyclist called Vine,
And boy did he just like to whine,
And then he would go,
On the radio to show,
That riding a bicycle is fine.


There was an old man called Trump,
Who's double garage was a dump,
It was full of old files,
Not in metres but miles,
And the FBI they did get the hump.


There was a young man named Elon,
Who for Twitter he did get a hard on,
So he paid through he nose,
And in Brazil X did close,
And now we all know he's a moron.


There was a young man named Huw,
[NEXT FOUR LINES EDITED BY MODS]

 

[roubaixtuesday]

A fine looking young man name of Drago
Alas suffered from painful lumbago
His sweet love came to call
And he gave it his all
But rolled over and called it a day go

 

[Drago]

There was a young man named Tues-day,
Who most definitely went all the way,
He chatted up the birds,
Even old Thora Hird,
But "a dirty old man" they did say.

 

[roubaixtuesday]

Young Drago went out on a ride
With Thora, his wannabe bride
Obsessed with his lycra
She screamed "I want that biker!"
Poor Drago, he ran but couldn't hide.

 

[Drago]

There was an old man named Robaix,
He had but one wandering eye,
He cleaned it in gin,
And stored in a tin,
Where it then ended up in a pie.

 

[Reynard]

Saw this one on the Book of Faces, and just had to share...

There was a young girl from Puddue
Who kept a young cat in a pew
She taught it to speak
Alphabetical Greek
But it never got further than μ

 

[Drago]

There was a young lass named Rey-nard,
And in a fist fight she was hard,
She'd punch in the guts,
And kick to the nuts,
Then slather her conquests in lard.

 

[Reynard]

There was a young lass named Rey-nard,
And in a fist fight she was hard,
She'd punch in the guts,
And kick to the nuts,
Then slather her conquests in lard.

 

[Ian H]

There once was an old chef from Slough
Whose cooking was really quite rough.
He baked a whole cow,
Tied its tail in a bow,
And served it to us with a cough.

 

[classic33]

There was a young schoolgirl from near Ely,
Who was baked by mistake in a pie.
To her mother’s disgust,
She emerged through the crust,
And exclaimed, with a yawn, Where am I?