The Dangers of Toilet Seats!

[Gwylan]

I don't know if many male riders have yet encountered this problem yet but it is becoming an annoying thing here at home !
Going to the little room is becoming like playing Russian Roulette!
Being good I lift the seat so as not to splash everywhere. Sometimes I shut my eyes as having prostate cancer it's difficult to get going. So with my eyes shut just relaxing there is a sudden almighty loud bang as the toilet seat slams shut! It's a good job I wasn't mid stream as It made me jump and almost have a heart attack! I could have had to mop up the floor as it made me jump out of my skin! I could have been maimed for life if it hadn't been for my quick reactions !
I believe that there is a conspiracy afoot! Toilet seat designers have discovered that if they can get the seat to be just off vertical when raised their ambition will be achieved! It is like a mouse trap sprung ready for action !
Beware ! You have been warned!

I find it would be nice if they warmed the water too!

 

[Gwylan]

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[presta]

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[grldtnr]

why not sit down, relax and take your time...your home loo does not have to be used like a public urinal. its also more hygienic than splashing piss around the floor.

Remind me of a story told to me by a sailing instructor, it's common practice, to be seated whilst at sea, in the confined area of the 'heads', especially so when it's bumpy.
He was telling me about a channel crossing he was doing with a group of trainee yachtmasters, one had gone below to do the necessary, in a rough crossing, promptly sat down with his 'tackle' out, the boat promptly fell into a big hole left by a wave, followed very quickly by an agonised bellow,........
Rushing below to investigate, the instructor saw the poor man sitting on the toilet, with a very puce face and his 'jewels' trapped below the seat.
He of course did his best to assist, and help the unfortunate, and immediately put out a 'pan-pan medico' alert, when he got into the port ,the boarding paramedic said ( allegedly) 'Monsieur , you don't need a doctor, but a Vet, for you must have a constitution on a prize bull !'


I felt for the unfortunate, if the story was true, IAM a hobby sailor too, and ever since, if I been taken short it's always into a bucket, or clipped on with a safety line and relieved my self down wind ,over the side.🥴

 

[dicko]

Those toilets that squirt water up your bum, bloody good fun 😂

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

Those toilets that squirt water up your bum, bloody good fun 😂

Nah - wife insisted on them when we got the bathrooms done - can;t do them - although I do wonder if the water pressure is too high!!

 

[Illaveago]

I find it would be nice if they warmed the water too!

Oh! You mean having to drink a lot of nearly ice cold water ?

 

[Illaveago]

Nah - wife insisted on them when we got the bathrooms done - can;t do them - although I do wonder if the water pressure is too high!!

There is a company nup the road which uses water jets to cut through metal .

 

[Gwylan]

Oh! You mean having to drink a lot of nearly ice cold water ?

No.

 

[dicko]

There is a company nup the road which uses water jets to cut through metal .

We used them to cut steel for punch and die sets when I was a toolmaker

 

[a.twiddler]

Those toilets that squirt water up your bum, bloody good fun 😂

We used to have a bidet that did that!

 

[newts]

We used to have a bidet that did that!

These new contraptions wash, blow dry & give you comb over all in one sitting😮

 

[grldtnr]

There is a company nup the road which uses water jets to cut through metal .

There is a company nup the road which uses water jets to cut through metal .

Certainly clear any Clagg, Berries or Klingons' up there 🤯

 

[presta]

Certainly clear any Clagg, Berries or Klingons' up there 🤯

I've got one of these to do that:

 

[matticus]

These new contraptions wash, blow dry & give you comb over all in one sitting😮

Clever guy, that Dyson chap. 👍