"Well that was a load of crap!"
I set off in good time and was immediately delayed by some old bloke cyclist weaving across the A5 like some drunken Dodo, and didn't get to HPC until 08:37. I pootled here, I pootled there, I pootle pootled every...'Hello Ian'. We rode around Hyde Park a couple of times. That was just a pain - going past all those empty flats at One Hyde Park, no peds to 'Oi!', or traffic to run the gauntlet with - it was upsetting.
We stopped for a coffee at the Serpentine. What a disaster. There was no queue and I got served immediately. The bloke behind the counter asked me about anger management while he gave me change. I nutted him and we sat watching the world go by, offering directions to passing tourists. Even the foreigners were out to interfere with my ride dammit!
After a luxury 'Serpee' (bloody toilets at that café were just too clean for my liking) we rolled back to Wellington Arch and had to suffer seeing a load of horses huffing and puffing (you know what Ross, LongMartin and Chris are like if they have had to ride for more than five minutes continuously...) and the the Household Cavalry.
We set off for Olympica - milky sunshine doing its best and we struggled against the three or four pedestrians doing the 'photo me' stuff in the road outside Bucking Hampalace (bloody tourists - they spoil a ride) and it was awful to cruise along at 18-20mph on that torrid surface that is The Mall.
It was a drag getting to Pudding Mill Lane - must have taken half an hour or so...even the road safety attendants were courteous, wishing us good day - I was getting sooooooooooo frustrated.
And then. More coffee. Four hours it took to get served- well, it seemed like it but might have been five minutes...even the observation tower was looking interesting.
The rest is history. The cruise ship, the gentle roll back into Londonville at 20 - 25 mph - not a car in sight - ba$tards. Just to top it all off - more coffee. All three of us queued - to make it look busy. It was about 1pm ish by now and we watched some shouting at Speakers Corner before splitting.
Oh, and we got invited to an exclusive screening of an epic adventure. A film crew did a 'day in the life of' about a bus driver on the Olympic site, who had been doing the same route every day for four years. Part of the film was about her in the Olympic pool, swimming the distance of her bus route. (I think) She must be fit! Semra Yusuf is her name (forgot I had the programme in my pocket!)
69.48 of your earth miles for me, and probably could have exceeded 100 - the weather made it too easy today.
Thanks to Chris, Ross, Martin and Ian for making this Sunday London Ride so awful. Get well soon Paul, and I hope everyone who fancied it enjoyed their ride, wherever they ventured. I did.