Stupid Americans

[Greedo]

Heard some talking in town today asking for directions. Jesus, the way they try to pronounce place names in Glasgow is hilarious.


I was reminded about the time I saw on the news about the guy who used to fire the One O'Clock gun at the castle in Edinburgh. He was getting some OBE or MBE for services to telling the time or some other pi$h. Think he's dead now

Anyway he was asked about all the tourists and the silly things they say and do.

He said one American guy asked him "why the hell did the build the castle so close to the railway line"

 

[sheddy]

But much more damaging is them dragging the world into recession.....
Or was it the BBC ?

 

[Greedo]

According to some on here it was probably Johnathon Ross and Russell Brand!

But much more damaging is them dragging the world into recession.....
Or was it the BBC ?

 

[Kirstie]

Yes there's the classic of showing them three words: tough; through and though. And then asking them to pronounce Loughborough.

 

[Blackandblue]

Reminds me of this oldie (but goodie).

Jay Fullmer, 38, yesterday became the first American to get to grips with the concept of irony.
"It was weird" Fullmer said. "I was in London and like, talking to this guy and it was raining and he pulled a face and said, "Great weather eh?" and I thought - "Wait a minute, no way is it great weather".
Fullmer then realised that the other man's 'mistake' was in fact deliberate.
Fullmer, who is 39 next month and married with two children, aged 8 and 3, plans to use irony himself in future.
"I'm, like, using it all the time" he said. "Last weekend I was grilling steaks, and I burned them, and I said "Hey, great weather."

 

[And]

Fixed it for you:

Heard some Brits talking in town today asking for directions. Jesus, the way they try to pronounce place names is hilarious - they didn't know how to pronounce 'Allegheny’ or ‘Monongahela’ or ‘Hohokam’ .

I was reminded about the time I saw on the ‘class’ documentaries by Prescott with the girls who didn't know what the Houses of Parliament were, and when they got there thought it was Buckingham Palace.

Anyway of them was asked about who they would vote for and she said 'the BNP's, innit' - her black friend was well impressed.

The Brits have no reason to be smug about ‘stupid Americans’.

And

 

[swee'pea99]

Wasn't she the one who said she was middle class, and Prescott said 'I would have called you working class' and she said 'But I don't work.'?

 

[And]

[quote name='swee'pea99']Wasn't she the one who said she was middle class, and Prescott said 'I would have called you working class' and she said 'But I don't work.'?[/QUOTE]

Yes! that's our girl! a real 'class' act..............

 

[Arch]

The story goes that one day an American in York asked a tour guide showing them around the Minster "Is this building pre-war?"

"Madam", he replied, with immense dignity, "This building is pre-America"..

 

[dodgy]

He said one American guy asked him "why the hell did the build the castle so close to the railway line"

I've heard the same said about Windsor castle and the airport. It's just a gag / urban myth.

 

[Nortones2]

There's the old one about the Bible being written in English, thus proving America's right to world domination or something....

 

[dan_bo]

want cheese with that?

 

[terry huckle]

Apparently this a list of some daft questions asked of Canadian Parks Rangers. Some of them may have come from Americans...or not, I`m not sure.

1. How do the elk know they're supposed to cross at the "Elk Crossing" signs?

2. At what elevation does an elk become a moose?

3. Tourist: "How do you pronounce 'Elk'?"

Park Information Staff: " 'Elk' "
Tourist: "Oh".

4. Are the bears with collars tame?

5. Is there anywhere I can see the bears pose?

6. Is it okay to keep an open bag of bacon on the picnic table, or should I store it in my tent?

7. Where can I find Alpine Flamingos?

8. I saw an animal on the way to Banff today - could you tell me what it was?

9. Are there birds in Canada?

10. Did I miss the turnoff for Canada?

11. Where does Alberta end and Canada begin?

12. Do you have a map of the State of Jasper?

13. Is this the part of Canada that speaks French, or is that Saskatchewan?

14. If I go to B.C., do I have to go through Ontario?

15. Which is the way to the Columbia Ricefields?

16. How far is Banff from Canada?

17. What's the best way to see Canada in a day?

18. Do they search you at the B.C. border?

19. When we enter B.C. do we have to convert our money to British pounds?

20. Where can I buy a raccoon hat? ALL Canadians own one, don't they?

21. Are there phones in Banff?

22. So it's eight kilometres away... is that in miles?

23. We're on the decibel system you know.

24. Where can I get my husband really, REALLY, lost??

25. Is that two kilometres by foot or by car?

26. Don't you Canadians know anything?

27. Where do you put the animals at night?

28. Tourist: "How do you get your lakes so blue?"
Park staff: "We take the water out in the winter and paint the bottom".
Tourist: "Oh!"

 

[Keith Oates]

I strongly suspect that it would be possible to make a similar list of questions asked by any nationality in the world, including the Brits!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Graham O]

Or how about "Is the North Pole warmer than the South Pole because hot air rises?"

Genuine. I wasn't quite sure how to answer that one.