cricket

[Speicher]

He is never one to baulk at the opportunity.

 

[Dayvo]

When it knocks, Speich, when it knocks!

 

[Dayvo]

I occasionally drank beer whilst playing (only on Sundays - non league matches, nothing to do with church)!

My team mates thought it was water in my bottle!

 

[Dave5N]

Never seen the point of a sport where you can look at the scoreboard and still have no idea who's winning.

Tedious, too.

 

[Speicher]

I tentatively mention Ladies' Cricket, seeing as how the British erm or was it English Ladies' Team won the World Cup.




just realised how many jokes I may have to field about bowling maidens over, etc etc.

 

[rich p]

Cricket is too slow for people with an attention span of goldfish and too subtle for those who prefer more slapstick action

 

[longers]

I'm not a big fan of cricket as such but I've watched a few village and pub teams and thoroughly enjoyed the afternoons.

I rode about a hundred and fifty miles over two days to watch a friend play for his local team a couple of years ago. When I say it was his local team, it used to be, he now lives and works in Reading and travels up to East Yorks every weekend during the season to turn out. Every year he says it's going to be his last season.

The match in question was over very quickly and there was an horrendous amount of beer supped.

 

[bonj2]

Bonj if you think cricket doesn't involve physical exertion then you obviously haven't been doing it right.

Well I know for one thing, saying "england are winning by 182 runs to 89" doesn't make as much sense as it would to say "england are winning by 182 ambles to 89".

 

[bonj2]

What about snooker - is that a sport? All that sitting about, then pointing a long stick at balls and putting them in a pocket?

And it has to be Very Quiet so they can concentrate.

obviously not - they wear bow ties to play it for god's sake! What's wrong with it being simply a 'game'?

 

[Speicher]

Do you wear cycling shoes?

 

[bonj2]

Where the players sit down and have a sip of Robinsons Barley water every 2 minutes, and all they do is hit a ball a couple of times then have a stand about.

the point is in tennis while it's in play the players are constantly in action. even the player who's waiting for it to come back to him has got to run back to be in the optimum position for returning the next shot.
In cricket, all they do is one of them wanders up to some stumps and lobs a ball overarm towards the bloke at the other stumps, then sometimes, but only if he feels like it mind, he hits it. Then when he's hit it, he ambles over to the other stumps and back, but again - only if he can be bothered, which he often can't.
The other blokes just get to have a rest and watch waiting for their turn to bat. Sometimes if it goes near one of them then they'll lob it back towards the stumps, but since they're spread all over the field, they don't have to run that far in order to get it 'cos if it's too far away there'll be another bloke nearer to it.

 

[rich p]

the point is in tennis while it's in play the players are constantly in action. even the player who's waiting for it to come back to him has got to run back to be in the optimum position for returning the next shot.
In cricket, all they do is one of them wanders up to some stumps and lobs a ball overarm towards the bloke at the other stumps, then sometimes, but only if he feels like it mind, he hits it. Then when he's hit it, he ambles over to the other stumps and back, but again - only if he can be bothered, which he often can't.
The other blokes just get to have a rest and watch waiting for their turn to bat. Sometimes if it goes near one of them then they'll lob it back towards the stumps, but since they're spread all over the field, they don't have to run that far in order to get it 'cos if it's too far away there'll be another bloke nearer to it.

As I said before, cricket is a game for people with subtlety and patience. You fail on both counts Bonjy baby, clearly having the mind of a young goldfish and the subtlety of a baseball bat. Let the scales (geddit) fall from your eyes and see the light.

 

[Chuffy]

I bet Bonj would move fast enough if he had Curtly Ambrose bearing down on him at a reasonable fraction of lightspeed...

 

[bonj2]

I bet Bonj would move fast enough if he had Curtly Ambrose bearing down on him at a reasonable fraction of lightspeed...

doesn't matter what speed the ball's travelling at, what speed the bowler's skipping along at, or how aggressive a face he's pulling to try and put you off, all you've got to do is swing the bat to coincide with when the ball's going to reach you.

 

[Rhythm Thief]

doesn't matter what speed the ball's travelling at, what speed the bowler's skipping along at, or how aggressive a face he's pulling to try and put you off, all you've got to do is swing the bat to coincide with when the ball's going to reach you.

Brilliant. Bonj, you're a comedy genius.