Bullying a female cyclist

[Pat "5mph"]

Just out of interest - how many guys on here have ever based choices about the colour of their jacket around whether or not it would make subject to unwanted attention from other road users ??

This is a good point.
A few years ago, a friend of mine, not a cyclist, was commenting on the (bad) weather on seeing a female cyclist riding by.
My friend said to me: "oh, from far you can't distinguish if they are a man or a woman, this is good".
The cyclist was, of course, wearing the ubiquitous bad weather hi-viz commuting gear.
The sentence made me think, but I can't abide yellow, all my gear is bright red, bright pink or black.
One thing I have noticed when I'm out and about on the bike on shared paths is that pedestrians routinely address me as "mate", sometimes even the women, say when their dog crosses unexpectedly or similar.

 

[Jimidh]

Good on you for lending a hand helping out a fellow cyclist being harrassed by a bunch of dickheads.

It’s just a pity they’ll probably get away with it and not have to face the consequences for their behaviour.

 

[mudsticks]

“To affirm that men and women are persons and as persons should be free, and yet to do nothing tangible to make this affirmation a reality, is a farce.”

“No one can be authentically human while he prevents others from being so.”

Paulo Freire

I love that you keep posting these inspirational, affirmations exhorting us to be better humans, sadly not many seem to be responding in spirit.

But please don't give up.

Some people learn best through constant repetition.

I was too surprised to be annoyed!

I'm top of the food chain, nothing frightens me

Being serious, which is difficult for me at the best of times, the point is the the arrishole gene isn't solely restricted to one gender either.

No its not,
But when was the last time you heard of a solo cyclist, being harassed to the point of abject terror by a carful if women??

I don't really believe that most blokes are too stupid to see these invidious inequalities.

I think it's more that if they acknowledge them, they'll have to change their own behaviours.
And more importantly (perhaps) start calling out other guys for poor attitude.

I was asking my younger son about all this earlier today.

He told me that one of the worst things that can happen to an insecure young guy, is to lose face in front of his mates.

Even if that compels him to join in d*ck*sh behaviour.

Interestingly he has more female friends than male.

I wonder if its anything to do with his general attitude towards them, as people??

 

[Drago]

But when was the last time you heard of a solo cyclist, being harassed to the point of abject terror by a carful if women??

Never. But so what? I don't behave like that, have nothing to answer or apologise for.

 

[mudsticks]

Never. But so what? I don't behave like that, have nothing to answer or apologise for.

Of course you don't.

That is so long as you are also doing your bit to see that no other guys ever behave like this - and that includes calling out behaviour or talk that might imply disrespecting women is OK.

Role modelling good behaviour.

Even if it feels uncomfortable, to do that.

Cos I've heard tell that the Real Neanderthals don't even listen to women, or their concerns ??

So I guess the good guys (including those at the top of 'the food chain') need to keep stepping up, yes?

 

[Drago]

Of course you don't.

So why single me out?

I received serious, career ending injuries while saving a female from a serious kicking, so I think I put my money where my mouth is to my own significant detriment. And I'd do it again.

 

[mudsticks]

So why single me out?

I received serious, career ending injuries while saving a female from a serious kicking, so I think I put my money where my mouth is to my own significant detriment. And I'd do it again.

I wasn't singling you out, I was pointing out that it's everyone's job to help create a fairer and less violent society.

So just saying "I wouldn't do it"

But then not saying anything about anyone else's talk or behaviour, isn't enough.

I'm really sorry you got beaten up, and horribly hurt, by people who thought violence was acceptable.

You'll know at first hand the horrors of it all.

No one should have to live in fear of violence, or change their clothing choices, or curtail their activities because of it.

Sadly many of us do.

Particularly if we are not 'top of the food chain'

 

[Pat "5mph"]

Never. But so what? I don't behave like that, have nothing to answer or apologise for.

Of course you don't have to apologize for the behaviour of others, but one hopes that if you witness such acts you'd call those out, expressing firm disapproval, stopping those others in their tracks.
Which, I am sure, you would do.
But: what about the manly "wink wink", "nudge nudge", "pow, what a piece of ..." among pals?
Macho culture is, imo, the first step that leads to the next, abusive, aggressive steps.
Don't get me wrong, us women casually lust after chaps too, of course we do.
The difference is we do not progress to abuse random chaps on bikes.
One may say "oh, well, of course not, a woman would end up the worse" - well not really, cars and other weapons could be employed, lots of women have physical strength.
Women don't routinely go about abusing men because it is ingrained in us that it's unacceptable for a woman to behave in an alpha male way because the alpha is by definition, well, male.
The tribal culture of the alpha male is what needs to be challenged, because it leads to bullying, harassment, social exclusion of women and of non conforming males.

 

[tom73]

@mudsticks i’m lucky we had a very left field reading list for my teaching degree. Saying that the whole course was very diffent to most some may even say radical. Boy it was fun though.

 

[Slick]

This is a good point.
A few years ago, a friend of mine, not a cyclist, was commenting on the (bad) weather on seeing a female cyclist riding by.
My friend said to me: "oh, from far you can't distinguish if they are a man or a woman, this is good".
The cyclist was, of course, wearing the ubiquitous bad weather hi-viz commuting gear.
The sentence made me think, but I can't abide yellow, all my gear is bright red, bright pink or black.
One thing I have noticed when I'm out and about on the bike on shared paths is that pedestrians routinely address me as "mate", sometimes even the women, say when their dog crosses unexpectedly or similar.

Whilst I'm sure some would argue it's sexist, I've always hated people who address females as mate. I'm not entirely sure why.