Any good jokes ... ?

[SpokeyDokey]

Brilliant.

One if the best if the recent jokes on here - made us both grin.

 

[mistyoptic]

 

[Cavalol]

I couldn't afford to take my kids to Sea World.
So I took them to Billingsgate Fish Market and told them to be quiet because they were sleeping.

 

[morrisman]

In the very hot summer of 1895 the Royal Navy became concerned about the excessive use of water by the matelots to cool themselves down after their recreational dancing on the poop deck. This led to the introduction of a hornpipe ban.

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[morrisman]

I lost 3 fingers on my right hand, so I asked my doctor if I would still be able to write with it.
She said "Maybe but I wouldn't count on it".

 

[tyred]

 

[Andy in Germany]

View attachment 639754

I've always liked this one:

Says it all from my point of view.

 

[swee'pea99]

View attachment 639754

Brings to mind this, which I stumbled across recently...

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[Seevio]

Tip: If you hear strange noises in the night, make stranger noises to assert dominance.

 

[tyred]

 

[PeteXXX]

I stopped at the motorway services, went in the shop and picked up a small bottle of coke, a bag of crisps and a mars bar.

At the till I said to the cashier …."Sorry I only have a twenty pound note".
She replied...…. "That's OK, you can put the crisps back."

😋

 

[postman]

pigeons

What's the difference between me and a pigeon.A pigeon can put a deposit on a Rolls Royce I cant.

 

[PaulB]

I've just spoken to a man named Pete Tong and he respectfully asks if people will stop blaming him for everything.