Any good jokes ... ?

[Buck]

Me: I’ve got a terrible fear of Tsunamis
Therapist: OK. How frequently does this occur?
Me: It comes in waves.

 

[Buck]

I can’t take my dog to the park anymore as the ducks keep attacking him.

Should have known as he’s a pure bred

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

(Not a joke) I’m still using toilet paper my dad bought in the 20th century.

Gotta admire I guy who settles on a proper panic and REALLY plans the panic buying

have you eaten all the tins of beans yet???

 

[Toshiba Boy]

Gotta admire I guy who settles on a proper panic and REALLY plans the panic buying

have you eaten all the tins of beans yet???

..... at least he's finally managed to get his computer working again.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[newts]

What is printed on it? Izal or Liverpool Echo

Was Izal ever fit for purpose?

From the urban dictionary;-
Breach the hull
to push one's digit through inferior quality paper when wiping one's arse.
"day 82, the men are gettin restless, squables are beginning and tempers are short. John Norton handed out the ships biscuits, but Mr Christian refused to eat, accuasing him of breaching the hull and not washing his hands" (from the log book of HMS Bounty, 1764)

 

[roley poley]

Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant and ask for a table for 26 please ."But there's only 13 of you" says the
maitre d ? "yes but we all want to sit on one side".

 

[Kestevan]

View attachment 580518

Sounds better than the last one.......

 

[Andy_R]

Tonight's Zoom meeting....

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Chris S]

View attachment 581750

It reminds me of the joke about a young child who asked his mother where he came from. She gave him a full biological explanation and then said, "Why do you ask?" "Well," he replied "there's a boy in my class who comes from Poland."

 

[Dayvo]