1000 Cycling Questions

[Aperitif]

How many potholes does it take to fill the albert hall?

One.
Mendelssohn's Violin Concerthole

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

One.
Mendelssohn's Violin Concerthole

That's an answer not a question

 

[Aperitif]

Oh sorry - One.
Mendelssohn's Violin Concerthole?

What is decadence suitable for..?

 

[Disgruntled Goat]

How many potholes does it take to fill the albert hall?

Takes about 3000 peanuts during the Last Night of the Proms

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

Is there a cure for cycle gear lust?

 

[NickM]

Why are UK drivers a bunch of ignorant murderous peasant thugs?

Ooooh, good one!

By the way, I shall be making random use of all the new smileys so that none of them feels neglected

Here are some of mine:

Why does my arse hurt?
Why does my neck ache?
Why are my hands tingling?

A: Because you're not riding a recumbent, you silly sod!

 

[Dayvo]

Why does my arse hurt?
Why does my neck ache?
Why are my hands tingling?

Are they cycling-related questions?

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

Why is the left handed pedal thread the wrong way around

 

[NickM]

Ah, I know the answer to that one!

Because your left-hand pedal would slowly wind itself out of the crank if it wasn't. Something to do with "precession", ISTR...

 

[Twenty Inch]

If I put my bike on a treadmill and wear some wings, will I take off?

Wait, wait, I know this one......

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

Is it possible that the process of buying a correctly fitting new bike is becoming such a drag that I may just give up?

 

[Twenty Inch]

Why are you trying to ride a bike in drag?

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

because my lycra gear is just so last week darling

 

[Dayvo]

Why is there never enough toilet roll left when you think you'll just about 'scrape it'?

 

[Aperitif]

Why is there never enough toilet roll left when you think you'll just about 'scrape it'?

That's a bog standard question...

Why do Park Tools make pizza cutters and bottle openers but not toilet roll holders? It's a rip off.