9 May. The Bodmin Beast
Unexpected side effects of the corona-lockdown are that I have forgotten my PIN number, still have the same two £20 notes in my wallet since February and no longer carry any money with me when I go out on a ride. Where would spend it? I haven't seen the inside of a shop since early March. And I feel guilty every time I go out on my bike in case I have to trouble the NHS.
To compound my guilt we have decided to drive somewhere with the bikes. You may stop reading at this point especially if you live in Wales, but the number of alternative routes from where I live is quite limited. We can all justify the unjustifiable eh? I feel like a criminal sneaking about looking for a discreet parking place. Honest officer, it is only 20 minutes drive from home.
Madame Crow wanted to see Bodmin Moor and being electrically propelled was uninterested in my protestations of the number of hills and their steepness. I am a dutiful husband and so here we are cycling uphill for a 550 foot ascent that's starts with a mean 12% and then steepens before levelling off to a sustained 7%. Madame chats about the flowers in the hedgerows and the interesting cottages she glimpses but my view is entirely focused on the bit of road just beyond the front wheel. Spin, puff, spin, puff.
The views from the top are extensive across the gorse yellowed moors to the giants of Cornwall, Brown Willy and Rough Tor, a stegosaurus ridge of granite tors that rises to an altitude defying 1430 feet above sea level. You have to go to Dartmoor to find higher than that. I am pleased to be there, even more pleased that the road ahead just undulates and then heads downhill. Madame often accuses me of not thinking far enough ahead and it is true; I am ignoring for the moment that what goes down must go up. I live for the thrill of downhill racing.
We zoom through Mount Pleasant on a fast downhill, passing houses still covered in VE flags. I zoom anyway for when I turn to check on Madame she is nowhere to be seen. I stop. I wait. I study the ground. I watch the road. Time passes. I idly consider cycling back up the hill to check on her but dismiss it. Easier to wait. And wait. She was late for our wedding.
Madame appears and shows me a photo she took with her phone. It is a highland cow, shaggy, blond with long curving horns that she found standing by the road. I didn't see it. Apparently it was very tame. Thus lateness explained. Not late at all but distracted.
An uphill and a then a downhill, the sun is now fully out and the warmth has brought out all the flowers, stitchwort poking through the bluebells and the tall stands of cowparsley, the sweet smell of wild garlic. Another steep uphill. Every hill is short, less than 150 feet but so very steep. None is less than 10%.
These lanes are quiet. Not just corona -quiet but 'no-one-lives here-or-drives-along -these lanes' quiet. This is 4x4 country. Another long uphill takes us back onto the moor proper again and the views open up from the deep, green hollow ways we have been following to the sudden vista of Colliford Lake, a blue oasis in the green and yellow of the moor.
Our route now follows the right side of the lake which snakes about so you can never see all of it, just small sections between low hills. This lake is fed by the streams running off Bodmin Moor and provides much of Cornwall's drinking water. It is fenced off with wire and signs. Not a place to swim or picnic and a swim seems almost attractive right now in the slow heat of the afternoon. The lane is a thin ribbon of tarmac that runs across the moor, occasionally dropping and then rising but never enough to shift me out of the big ring on the front. Madame thinks it is like Scotland but to me it lacks the rising land of real mountains. Brown Willy is not Buchaille Etive Mor.
The lane finishes as it buts up to the A30, a dual carriage way here and normally on a Bank Holiday it would be packed. Today it is silent. We stop briefly at the Jamaica Inn, a granite honeypot for tourists that for weeks and weeks has just been dozing in the heat of this corona spring and waiting for the lockdown to end. From here we can follow the infant River Fowey back onto the moor, the road as rough as the landscape around it; granite bones exposed, a wilderness of gorse, bracken and rough grass. We stop again as Madame sees some new lambs, resting her bike on mine as I sit and watch the river. There is no sound more soothing than moving water on a warm day.
Leaving the River Fowey we push uphill again, my breathing ragged and legs on fire, to reach the summit of the hill only to be immediately faced with a steep drop down into the next valley. And so it goes on through the afternoon; up, up up, down, down ,down. These are more empty lanes, the surface broken and scattered with rain washed soil and gravel, a ridge of grass up the centre. I am pleased to have 32mm wide tyres even if they do slow me up on the hills. The bike vibrates and bucks as it runs downhill, my hands on the brakes, peering around the bends to see where we are going next, the thought of a vehicle on these lanes the last thing on my mind.
We are deep down in these lanes, the hedges sitting on banks, the road surface dug into the land so we can see no more than the next bend with no real idea of where we are. There is one savage hill, rising for 400 feet and always 8-10%, those angles seem like resting places compared to the ramps where it kicks up to 17%, 18% or even 20%. This lane is littered with false summits, always pretending it will finish soon, promising to give me some relief from this continuous journey upwards but each time as I round the bend, it rises again. I am soaked through with sweat at the top and stand astride my bike, legs trembling, heart thumping, breathing as deeply as I can as my body continues to demand oxygen. Madame photographs me. She has been here for a while and points out her battery is running low. So is mine I tell her.
Convinced that this is the last hill we continue down, the road cut into the hillside with a big drop on the left and a view across a secret valley, glimpsed between trees. It would be a fast descent if it were not so rough.
It is not the last hill. There are more. I yearn for something flat or even just sloping. Something other than hills where my front wheel is lifting off the ground followed by descents where my brakes are cooking all the way down.These are not flowing descents but a nervy bump down potholed tarmac and gravel tracks, twisting left then right between granite lined walls and tall hedges, our vision ahead limited to ten or twenty yards. Lower down we are in the woods, cool green havens for the deer I glimpse once or twice and then higher up once again after yet another ascent, we can see across the moors. The extensive view is reward for our efforts.
There has to be a final hill however and it does arrive bringing us back onto wider lanes and then a road with vehicles, more level country now with tidy hedgerows and cultivated fields. A mellow finish to the day and after a 120 miles and 10000 feet of climbing in the last three days, I need a mellow finish.
This is a beast of a ride, appropriately enough on Bodmin Moor with its stories of escaped panthers or maybe more mysterious beasts, lost in Cornwall's mists. Tomorrow it will rain - and for once I am glad. I need the rest.