THE SEVERN BORE versus DONGER .One is a natural phenomenon; an unstoppable force of nature. The other is a tidal wave. But which one is faster?
I was a bit bored and got itchy feet this morning, so I set out to discover the answer, and supply photographic evidence. I had previously had a chance encounter with the bore while riding along Epney's waterfront, and had measured its speed at 14.5 mph, though I knew it could go faster. But who would win in a straight race? Not just along the waterfront, but over a decent distance, round the lanes? It is difficult to tell whether the river travels further than the road does, given all the twists and turns in both of them. When my family lived in Epney, many years ago, I recall people used to race the bore from Arlingham to Maisemore in their cars, getting as many views of it as they could, and screeching off down the lanes in pursuit. It was too late to get to Arlingham, but I could give it a go on my bike for some of the stretch that gets the Severn Bore.
I set off for Epney, intending to meet the bore, then sprint up to Stonebench or Elmore Back to meet it again. I had thought of going as far as Maisemore, but the rush hour traffic on the Gloucester Western Bypass might have confounded my plan. Instead, I settled on Elmore Back for the end of my race, being directly opposite Minsterworth, where you sometimes get big crowds of spectators on the opposite bank, so it must be a good viewing spot.
I arrived at Epney with 5 minutes to spare before the predicted tide time of 09:33, and the re was no sign of it, so I hurried on further to Framilode, the next village along the road, and took up position on top of the concrete dyke wall opposite the church with my camera at the ready. At 09:36 the gentle end of the bore started to creep along the mudbank on the inside side of the bend on the opposite bank, ridden by a canoeist.
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This scattered the flocks of gulls and terns that had been dozing on the mudbanks. This is often the first clue to the crowds along the banks at Epney that it is coming.
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The bigger, rougher end of the bore came foaming and crashing by me on the outside of the bend, but I was already stowing my camera, ready to get going. As it passed me, I ran for my bike and got out of Framilode like a bat out of hell, heading for the next stop at Epney.
The road is a dead end, and you have to cycle directly away from the river at first, before regaining the main lane and sprinting for it. I'm a bit on the large side for a cyclist (taller than the average door frame, and nearly as wide), so I'm not exactly built for this game, and I was riding a heavy touring bike. At 53 years old, I'm also probably old enough to know better, but I really went for it. 18 ....19....20...21mph....
cutting all the corners and really getting my head down....first sight of the crowds along the waterfront ....then the sound of the bore running alongside me, just out of sight.... Sprint, sprint, sprint... A little group of white goats appeared to be standing on tippytoes surreally straining to look over the dyke wall at whatever was making all the noise. I'd normally have taken a picture, but this was too close to call. Carried on sprinting for a couple of hundred more yards and screeched to a halt on the Prom with only 2 or 3 seconds to spare to get my camera out and take these shots at 09:40. A dead heat so far!
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Didn't hang about, but got straight back on the bike and shifted it in the direction of Longney, probably averaging about 18mph.
When I got level with Longney Sands, I glanced across to my left and it all looked peaceful and shiny across the mudflats. I guessed I was slightly ahead of the tide, and kept really going for it through Longney and along the winding lane towards Elmore. Just before Elmore, I hung a left and flew down into the marshy area down by the river, along another dead end road to Elmore Back. Past the reeds ....through the farmyard....cutting a right hander ....past a group of startled horses...sprinting parallel to the river, panting all the way until I came to the first public right of way with a style, where I skidded to a rather ungainly halt. I quickly lifted the bike over the style and pushed it across a small field and through a gate by the dyke wall - which was grassy here, and lined with trees along the riverbank. Had I done it?
YESSS! The river was still flowing calmly downstream at 10:00, so I had beaten it over a distance of about 7 miles.
Donger 1, Severn Bore 0. 
I reckoned I had time to find myself an unobstructed view of the river, so I pushed the bike along the top of the dyke .... it would be worth it for the photo. Over another style .... It would be worth it for the photo. Through a field full of vicious stinging nettles (in my shorts).... it would be worth it. Through a mass of gloopy mud underfoot....... it would be worth it. And over another style. I stood on the style and planned the perfect photo... one that really showed the full force of the wave flying up from the opposite bank. Opposite me on the Minsterworth side of the river, there was a group of spectators, and a large herd of cattle, grazing dangerously half way down the riverbank. This would make for a great photo. The cattle were about to get a big surprise. This would be some picture when the bore came. Took a practice shot:
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10:08. Here it comes! This is going to be good.... I stood a little higher on the style, hurting my shins in the process ...... but it would be worth it for this Pullitzer Prize photo..... The money shot..... Wait for it! Split second timing required ...
3, 2, 1 ............... and the f****ing camera timed me out! Aaargh! No photo after all that! Then a red flashing light and the camera gave up on me.
Camera 1, Donger 0.
Strolled back home on the bike a bit disconsolately until I got to Stonebench - where the road runs right along the riverbank for a moment, and there was a raging torrent heading upstream, carrying trees and other debris. On the off chance, I got the camera out again, and the f***ing thing worked perfectly this time!
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On balance, still all good fun this morning, if a little frustrating. 17.9 miles before breakfast, and an interesting challenge. Can't be bad. Must try that again some time, over the full distance from Arlingham to Maisemore.
Cheers,
Donger.
(Shawbury aerodrome). It isn't always accurate - I know that with the way the wind flows round the hills locally it can come from a different direction and be a different strength to what they say. For the last couple of days though I do believe them.
) There was quite a spectacular rainbow but it was only visible while the rain was still coming down where I was so the camera stayed put.
),otherwise no issues.
