Your A&E visits......funny or serious

[Beebo]

I was paying for my dinner in the works canteen and, unusually for me, used my credit card. Just as I was about to pay I had an itchy nose, and poked myself in the the eye with the corner of the credit card. Hurt more than I expected but sat down to eat my dinner. Half way through my dinner someone else joined the group and said "my god, what have you done to my eye", then various comments from around the table "you need to get that looked at" followed by "seriously, you need to get that looked at - go to casually right now !" I'd managed to nick the surface of my eye - thankfully not the lens - but looked like Dracula. I only saw it after returning from casualty - it was just eye drops to help healing and prevent infection - but it looked ghastly. That is probably my silliest visit.

And to sympathise with Accy's paint incident - you don't want to f-about with eyes. Fair enough if emulsion paint washes out, but if it persists or in hurting or is a more "chemically" paint 'd get it looked at.

My dad was staking out some pea plants, when he bent down to pull a weed and got the stake right in his eye.
He had months of repeat visits to the eye specialist. We were very worried but thankfully no long term damage.

He also did the classic error of unjamming a clogged lawn mower whilst it was still plugged in. Resulting in severed tendons in his fingers. He was home alone and drove himself to hospital with his hand in a tea towel. He is in his 70s now with a claw hand.

 

[ColinJ]

I was paying for my dinner in the works canteen and, unusually for me, used my credit card. Just as I was about to pay I had an itchy nose, and poked myself in the the eye with the corner of the credit card. Hurt more than I expected but sat down to eat my dinner. Half way through my dinner someone else joined the group and said "my god, what have you done to my eye", then various comments from around the table "you need to get that looked at" followed by "seriously, you need to get that looked at - go to casually right now !" I'd managed to nick the surface of my eye - thankfully not the lens - but looked like Dracula. I only saw it after returning from casualty - it was just eye drops to help healing and prevent infection - but it looked ghastly.

My dad was staking out some pea plants, when he bent down to pull a weed and got the stake right in his eye. He had months of repeat visits to the eye specialist. We were very worried but thankfully no long term damage.

Oh, I'd forgotten a trip to A&E for a similar injury ...

I managed to flick a rusty nail into one of my eyes when I worked in a factory in the 1980s - I definitely do not recommend it! The pain was excruciating and the eyelids immediately swelled up and closed the eye. I thought I had blinded myself in that eye.

I was rushed to the nearest A&E and the doctor who treated me let out a low whistle after prising open the eyelids and staining the surface of the eyeball to show up whatever damage had been caused. The tip of the nail had gone right across the eye, scratching the surface but not puncturing it!

I was given some kind of antiseptic/antibiotic cream for the eye and told to wear an eye patch for a week. The eye hurt for a few days, but no lasting harm was done.

 

[winjim]

I heard a story once, don't know how true it is. I suspect likely not, but an eye watering tale.

Late one night a guy comes in from ambo, naked, covered in blood, with his nadger hanging on by a thread of flesh.

About half an hour later his girlfriend presents herself at A and E with some very nasty facial bruising.

The story goes that she had been, erm, trying to inflate the autopilot, when she had some kind of fit and her teeth clamped down hard. Chappie was unsurprisingly a little surprised, and in not a little bit of pain, was desperately trying to get her off...

Skip to 17 minutes...

 

[gbb]

A serious one, not mine but a guy personally known to me and it just goes to show how life changes in a split second.
I was an engineering buyer in a former job and met plenty of folk, one in particular we did regular business and got on well. I'd always noticed he was heavily scarred on one side of his neck, jaw and probably his shoulder downwards.
I asked him one day...if you dont mind me asking, what happened there......
'No idea...seriously, no idea, I woke up in intensive car'

He explained further, hed been driving on the A1 and a car obviously came across the central reservation and piled into him, he never saw it, felt it...bang, and unconcious.

They were heavy scars, he must have spent some time in hospital.

 

[gbb]

My dad was staking out some pea plants, when he bent down to pull a weed and got the stake right in his eye.
He had months of repeat visits to the eye specialist. We were very worried but thankfully no long term damage.
.

My poor old dad, gone now bless him, was completely blind from 65 to 84. In his late 70s he'd leant over the edge of the settee to pick something up and rammed his eye into a potted plant steak.
Christ knows, things used to shock him quite easily, he didn't have visual warning of impending danger. His eyeball was blood red for weeks.

 

[tyred]

My hospital consultant friend told me a few of the funny ones, my favourite being the guy who turned up convinced he had severe jaundice and was going to die when what had actually happened was that he had mistakenly applied what he thought was suntan lotion but it was actually his daughter's fake tan...

 

[classic33]

Usual reason for being there, A&E. And as was normal at the time they kept me in to keep an eye on me.

I'd a minor one whilst there, result being that the left arm was hanging down. Goes an "odd colour" if it's colder. Doctor doing the rounds, checking on who's where and why. Enters the cubicle, saw the arm hanging down(odd colour), calls out to a nurse whilst moving my arm back up and pulling the sheet over the head. At this point, I moved, making him move quicker.

Don't know who was more put out me or him, when "the body" tried to sit up.

 

[Nigeyy]

I've posted this before but it's my only good ER story

A couple of years ago I was a bit off colour and was in the ER, and ended up having to get a spinal, or spinals as the case was as.
First doctor in has about 3 attempts and my right leg is getting really uncomfortable as the needle must keep hitting the around the same nerves. Anyway, after the 3rd attempt he tells me he's going to call in a physician who is known for his spinal tap expertise. He comes in, fails at the first attempt, and then I hear the immortal words (without any attempt to not let me hear, mind you): "We're going to need a bigger needle" accompanied with some short sharp intakes of breath. Well, yet another couple of attempts later, he's finally successful, but then I hear: "mmm....oh...come and look at this.... I've never seen this before!". I could have done without hearing all of that.....

At the time not so funny, but now a couple of years later I do find it amusing in a dark humourous sort of way.

 

[ColinJ]

I had made it through A&E and had been installed in a ward just in time for the consultant's round. He got into some small talk with me, picked up my medical info, read it and stopped mid-sentence. He swivelled to face the nurses' station at the end of the ward and barked out "WHY ISN'T COLIN ON RAT POISON YET!"

 

[ColinJ]

Oh, I forgot my 'pregnancy test'!

I ended up at Northampton General A&E (I was visiting my sister at the time). They did a blood test to test for clotting and I waited with my sister for the results ...

Some time later, a doctor returned clutching some paperwork. He looked me up and down, leaned forwards and said "Tell me Colin, is there any chance whatsoever that you might be pregnant?"

My sister looked stunned - a real jaw-dropping WTF! moment. I looked at her, and said ... "Oh damn - I know what that means!"

I told her that pregnancy can mess up the results of the D-dimer blood test and that my results clearly were not normal! The doctor laughed, then composed himself and told me that the numbers were extremely high and they needed to admit me for further tests. Again - I thought it was funny, but that was only because I already knew that I was going to be get a positive result. (I was struggling for breath, which told me that the clots had come back.)

I would rather be treated by staff that were trying to lighten the mood where possible, than by somebody looking incredibly sombre and scaring me half to death!

 

[AndreaJ]

Not quite A&E but still involves doctors, I am a veterinary nurse and our practice shares a car park with a doctors surgery. The doctors is slightly hidden round the corner of the car park which confuses some people, one of the local “characters “ came marching in one day loudly demanding to see a doctor NOW and wasn’t leaving until he had seen one, we let him carry on with his rant and he sat down to wait. Slowly it dawned on him where he was and he declined our offer of treatment He did apologise for the rant and left much happier than when he arrived.

 

[swee'pea99]

Not quite A&E but still involves doctors, I am a veterinary nurse and our practice shares a car park with a doctors surgery. The doctors is slightly hidden round the corner of the car park which confuses some people, one of the local “characters “ came marching in one day loudly demanding to see a doctor NOW and wasn’t leaving until he had seen one, we let him carry on with his rant and he sat down to wait. Slowly it dawned on him where he was and he declined our offer of treatment He did apologise for the rant and left much happier than when he arrived.

Wagging his tail?

 

[gbb]

One winter Sunday morning I'd fone for a ride on my hybrid and on the way home I came round a bend to be met with slippery leaves...band, down I went, wrenching my little finger, I felt a tearing sensation so knew it was moderately bad. Got home, put dinner on the back burner and down to A&E. Wife came with me, went through triage, into a treatment room and nurse told me it was a dislocated finger...we'll give you some gas and air and just pull it out.....
My wife went whiter than i did....sod that she said, I'm not watching that...got up, abandoned me and waited outside

Yeah, thanks

 

[Profpointy]

Not quite A&E but still involves doctors, I am a veterinary nurse and our practice shares a car park with a doctors surgery. The doctors is slightly hidden round the corner of the car park which confuses some people, one of the local “characters “ came marching in one day loudly demanding to see a doctor NOW and wasn’t leaving until he had seen one, we let him carry on with his rant and he sat down to wait. Slowly it dawned on him where he was and he declined our offer of treatment He did apologise for the rant and left much happier than when he arrived.

Telling him you were only doing castrations that morning probably did the trick

 

[AndreaJ]

Telling him you were only doing castrations that morning probably did the trick

That’s more or less what we told him, maybe with a bit more gory detail though