Ok, here goes....you unplug the charger and return it to the box. You remove the battery and return it to the box. You remove the Micro SD card and swallow it. You replace the handset in the box. Still with me? You return the box containing said bits to the shop where they came from. On the way home, you pop into Tesco's (other supermarkets are available) and buy 2 of these:
View attachment 358449
(other flavours/manufacturers will suffice)
and some of this
View attachment 358450
(other colors/lengths are available)
and follow the instructions found
here. Simples.