Can I get a 2nd opinion on this - is it definitely ok to eat cold out of the packet??
Yes it's definitely cooked already, it's boiled in the skin during production (for a good hour I believe). My Father in law used to make it at a slaughterhouse in Scotland for the local butchers.
When you cook it at home you're only warming it through / crisping it up. Of course it's much nicer with a crisp edge and I'd baulk at eating it cold too, but it's perfectly safe to do. The older generation in Bury generally eat it cold anyway, straight from the market with vinegar on.
My vote is for coffee that isn't coffee, like an iced triple mocha chai skim latte no-foam, or as Larry David referred to them.... "one of those vanilla bullshit things". If you want to have something like a chocolate milkshake, just have a chocolate milkshake.