The selfishness of people

[Saluki]

Working with people, I know how self centred that they can be but this takes the biscuit.

A groomer buddy of mine passed away last night. Brain Hemorrhage apparently. She had had a headache all weekend but mostly ignored it as the in-laws were staying over. The medics could not save her and she died.
First thing this morning, her husband got on the phone and rang all her customers due over the next couple of days to let them know the news and to let them know not to bring their dogs to theirs for grooming. He got the normal "I am so sorry" reactions from about 1/3 of the people.The others not so nice
One person said how inconvenient it was to have to find a new groomer.
Several people said "what about my dog groom?"
Another asked him to ring around other groomers and call them when he has booked them an appointment.
One, who obviously didn't listen' said "OK, when she is back to work let me know. Will it be within a week or so?"

I was shocked to the core. Not only that Becky died so young (49, the same age as me) but at the reactions of her clients. When I broke my arm, my husband rang around for me and got the whole 'what about my dog' thing but Becky has died and those customers were much more concerned about their pooches.
Now, I have never actually met Becky, but have chatted with her, online for years. I have spoken to her on the phone and swapped tips and whatnot but I am so sad that she has gone. The reaction from people who had met her and did know her just beggars belief.

 

[vernon]

It could be more a case of customers not listening properly and not letting the full implications of what's happened register.

 

[madferret]

Sorry to hear your news. Happened to a close friend of mine at 23. Its such a shock. People can be so short sighted and it must be terrible for her husband to have deal with them at such a time

 

[PaulB]

One case I heard of concerns a pharmaceutical rep who was out to impress his boss travelling with him. They went in one family-run pharmacy and the rep asked if he could see the pharmacist, Mr. ..... The woman behind the counter said 'no, I'm sorry, that's my husband and he died last week.' The rep looked at her, then down at his file, pre-computer days and it was one of those clipboards with a sheet of calls to make pencilled in on it, and to show his efficiency he asked the woman, 'have you got a rubber?'

 

[Saluki]

Sorry to hear your news. Happened to a close friend of mine at 23. Its such a shock. People can be so short sighted and it must be terrible for her husband to have deal with them at such a time

He said, on the grooming forum, that he was ringing around 'while he could deal with it'. One of the other, local to him, groomers said that if he liked, she would pop over and call everyone else or mail them letters for him. She is not trying to get trade from a dead woman, she is just a nice girl trying to help out her late friend's husband.

One case I heard of concerns a pharmaceutical rep who was out to impress his boss travelling with him. They went in one family-run pharmacy and the rep asked if he could see the pharmacist, Mr. ..... The woman behind the counter said 'no, I'm sorry, that's my husband and he died last week.' The rep looked at her, then down at his file, pre-computer days and it was one of those clipboards with a sheet of calls to make pencilled in on it, and to show his efficiency he asked the woman, 'have you got a rubber?'

Oh my word!! Foot in mouth or what

 

[annedonnelly]

It could be more a case of customers not listening properly and not letting the full implications of what's happened register.

I think Vernon's probably right. Most people (and I'm sure we're all guilty of it) don't listen very well - they'll have heard "dog grooming" & "cancel" and immediately started thinking about how it affects them.

 

[Lisa21]

I think Vernon is pretty spot on, people don't listen most of the time anyway. But then some can be unbelievable and imo does it matter if they realised they were speaking to the poor womans husband or not.. its a dreadful way of thinking whomever your speaking too. Its a sad story and I really feel for you-i lost a very good friend in exactly the same way and its a terrible shock. Look after yourself, and try not to let the thoughtless words of others upset you xx

 

[vernon]

I witnessed total insensitivy from a head teacher that I once worked for.

I saw him encounter one of my colleagues in a corridor at work and said to her: "Hang on there's something that I need to talk to you about but it's slipped my mind." He then pulled out his notebook and looked at his to do list then said: " I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father." He then briskly marched on to address the next item on his list.

He lived his life professionally and domestically from to do lists. He even, on his own admission, planned conception with his wife so that the birth of their children would be during the holidays and not need paternity leave.

 

[madferret]

I witnessed total insensitivy from a head teacher that I once worked for.

I saw him encounter one of my colleagues in a corridor at work and said to her: "Hang on there's something that I need to talk to you about but it's slipped my mind." He then pulled out his notebook and looked at his to do list then said: " I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father." He then briskly marched on to address the next item on his list.

He lived his life professionally and domestically from to do lists. He even, on his own admission, planned conception with his wife so that the birth of their children would be during the holidays and not need paternity leave.

Wow.....sounds like The Brittas Empire guy.

 

[Col5632]

I witnessed total insensitivy from a head teacher that I once worked for.

I saw him encounter one of my colleagues in a corridor at work and said to her: "Hang on there's something that I need to talk to you about but it's slipped my mind." He then pulled out his notebook and looked at his to do list then said: " I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father." He then briskly marched on to address the next item on his list.

He lived his life professionally and domestically from to do lists. He even, on his own admission, planned conception with his wife so that the birth of their children would be during the holidays and not need paternity leave.

It's bad if you need a list to remember something as terrible as that especially when he is the boss

 

[The Horse's Mouth]

Firstly and most importantly my condolences.

Personally, I think society in general is more selfish. I'm only 45 but i seem to remember a time when people cared more and everybody looked out out for eachother. Now its "look after number one."

Something changed sometime in the 80s or maybe I'm just looking at the 70s with rose tinted glasses.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

Sorry to read about your loss, Saluki.

 

[BigonaBianchi]

Sorry to hear this...it is a strange feeling losing a friend you haven't met...that happened to me only a few weeks back. I'm not all that surprised by some peoples selfish thoughtless reactions, these days many people really don't give a stuff about anybody except themselves, it's horrid but true.

 

[Over The Hill]

My mum died recently and first thing I had from DWP was a demand for £7.60 they had overpaid to her.

I rented a flat many years ago when you still had a rent book and paid the rent by cheque monthly. Two lads in flat above. One, who was the named person on the rent book killed himself. Landlord just put a line through his name and wrote the other lads name above it on the same rent book.

 

[ColinJ]

My mum died recently and first thing I had from DWP was a demand for £7.60 they had overpaid to her.

Sorry to hear about your mother, OTH ...

My mum died a couple of years ago and we phoned a call centre to arrange to close one of her accounts. The operative insisted that we put her on the phone to verify that she wanted the account closing. We reminded the operative that the mum in question was still, in fact, dead. Not good enough, we must put her on the phone to verify ... "WE ... CAN'T ... DO ... THAT ... - ... SHE ... IS ... DEAD!!!!!!"

A lot of people are clearly spending their working days not engaging their brains in what they are supposed to be doing.

Oh, and there are also some selfish b*stards about!

On a slightly more cheerful note ... my sisters and I recently got a £300 rebate when the accountants at the sheltered home that our mum had been living in finally noticed that she had died with several weeks of advance rent unused.