This is going to make me unpopular on both sides of the border.
The last England game I watched was when I was in Italy during Euro 2016 and it was honestly a perfectly enjoyable game. It was at that point I realised it's not the England side I'm against, or even the porcine, thuggish degenerates amongst the fans (we have plenty of our own porcine, thuggish degenerate fans up here)...
It's the media coverage. It's the constant talking about "us", completely oblivious to the fact that many of the people watching aren't part of "us".
It's the constant hyping up. It's the "it's coming home", as if that wasn't a mediocre song written by a middleweight comedian and his pal Salacious B. Crumb. It's the constant harping on about 1966.
That's why I'm nominally a member of Team ABE. The main source of joy I took from it was seeing Mark farking Lawrenson's miserable fizzog fall when England get put out.
Like I say, this tournament, I'm torn, because Gareth Southgate comes across as a really genuine, humble, lovely guy. A true leader, and I would be happy for him to finally be able to kill the demons he's carried from that penalty. The team also doesn't seem to have as many of the primadonna peanuts I have traditionally associated with them.
I've also loved seeing the idiots that tried to disavow the England squad for being "woke" exposing their own massive hypocrisy by furiously rowing back now that there's a chance of glory.
However, I also want England to lose because I don't want to be hearing about it for the next 55 flipping years.