Pretentious waffle please

[Archie_tect]

Any artist's description of their work in the Tate Modern, The Baltic or MIMA...

 

[Old jon]

Any artist's description of their work in the Tate Modern, The Baltic or MIMA...

Or even the Hepworth, a vast helping of bullfeathers was offered last Sunday . . .

 

[perplexed]

Any artist's description of their work in the Tate Modern, The Baltic or MIMA...

I'm pretty sure I once came within a gnat's trump of being ejected from Tate modern for openly guffawing at the absolute bu**^$t on the 'explainer' plaque by the object... The guard followed me for a bit.

 

[Andy in Germany]

Any artist's description of their work in the Tate Modern, The Baltic or MIMA...

I'm pretty sure I once came within a gnat's trump of being ejected from Tate modern for openly guffawing at the absolute bu**^$t on the 'explainer' plaque by the object... The guard followed me for a bit.

I once heard of a tour guide who said of the Tate Modern "It costs nothing, and if you've seen any modern art you'll know why..."

 

[Grant Fondo]

I once heard of a tour guide who said of the Tate Modern "It costs nothing, and if you've seen any modern art you'll know why..."

I actually think most artwork isn't that pretentious, it's the critiques and reviews that make your toes curl. Angel of the North is a good example, that had some right chod written about it.

 

[nickyboy]

Nah can’t get much less pretensious than View attachment 440200

The Birds Eye ones are so waffely versatile. Apparently

 

[srw]

Having had several poor line-caught bass and hand-dived scallop dishes i now realise they are either a) covering up the products freshness (hand-paddled in boat then foot-walked from sea to restaurant?) or b) it was stuck in freezer some time after hand catching.

Oh i forgot c) they are just pretentious.

Or (d) aware that trawling for fish and dredging for shellfish is hugely destructive and will in pretty short order destroy the stocks on which their business depends.

Like most of the so-called "pretentiousness" on offer in the thread this is another case of the reader not bothering to understand.

 

[subaqua]

Or (d) aware that trawling for fish and dredging for shellfish is hugely destructive and will in pretty short order destroy the stocks on which their business depends.

Like most of the so-called "pretentiousness" on offer in the thread this is another case of the reader not bothering to understand.

Or they were just lying about its provenance. Hand caught scallops are absolutely amazing . Especially when eaten fresh while hanging on a Deco stop.

Any scallop requires little more than a few seconds per side to cook otherwise it’s like chewing elastic. That’s usually the problem ..

If you want colour on them then cook some Chorizo first and set aside then cook in the orange coloured oil it leaves behind.

Or put some paprika in the hot butter..

 

[Ming the Merciless]

These biscuits have been taste profiled against your drink.

 

[oldwheels]

I never order scallops when eating out. They are always wasted by the addition of some pretentious sounding sauce. Fry some bacon bits and then scallops in the same pan. You can actually taste the scallop. I used to dive for them and we had them fresh as soon as I got home.

 

[Drago]

Those that fancy a bit of high grade pseudo business communication based waffle...

https://www.atrixnet.com/bs-generator.html

I suspect many senior police officers use this in their work.

 

[NorthernDave]

I walked past one of our local shops earlier. On one of the advertising boards outside, they were offering:


'Hand-tied bouquets available to order'...

'Hand-tied'? What on Earth is that bringing to the party?

I was lucky enough to enjoy a selection of oven roasted meat at a carvery the other day.

Pretty much every line from the BMW 8 series brochure is a pile of pretentious sh*te... can a CC'er who is good at maths do an exponential curve showing that more luxurious/expensive = more preposterous. Just check out the perfume ads at christmas...lunacy!

Not sure its a BMW thing in particular.
In-flight magazines from Ethiad, Emirates etc etc are fertile ground for world record pretentiousness.

Try an Aston Martin brochure...

"For over half a century, the name DBS has meant just one thing: the ultimate production Aston Martin. A DBS is a distilled concentrate of all that has made Aston Martin not just one of the most coveted brands in the automotive sphere, but in all fields of endeavour, right around the world.

Now the new DBS Superleggera has arrived. Its beauty leaves no room for doubt. Its power cannot be reasoned with.

Unquestionably, DBS Superleggera sits at the pinnacle of the Aston Martin production range. It is both a shining light expressing the most beautiful automotive art and, at the same time, a dark and menacing shadow of brutal, unequivocal strength. It is this fine blend of seemingly opposing traits that makes the DBS Superleggera the absolute Aston Martin"

 

[Grant Fondo]

Or (d) aware that trawling for fish and dredging for shellfish is hugely destructive and will in pretty short order destroy the stocks on which their business depends.

Like most of the so-called "pretentiousness" on offer in the thread this is another case of the reader not bothering to understand.

No i do understand and i used to net fish myself, in small quantities, so just have a difference of opinion.

 

[youngoldbloke]

- see Turner Prize shortlist 2018. https://www.tate.org.uk/whats-on/tate-britain/exhibition/turner-prize-2018

 

[Proto]

"Anyone who uses the word workshop outside the context of light engineering is a twat” - Alexei Sayle