Pretentious waffle please

[AndyRM]

Kevin McCloud likes to wax lyrical at every opportunity.

'Indeed, one is taken on a veritable voyage of nausea into the carcass of a much-neglected ruin laid waste by time and poverty: however splendour returns to the ancient habitat and is once again a ziggurat to behold'. (my words, not his).

Every decently-made object, from a house to a lamp post to a bridge, spoon or egg cup, is not just a piece of 'stuff' but a physical embodiment of human energy, testimony to the magical ability of our species to take raw materials and turn them into things of use, value and beauty.

I do like him, though and enjoy watching Grand Designs.

Agreed. Though I wish he'd go back to doing more physics lessons with biscuits, they were hilarious.

As for pretentious waffle, Morrissey's novella List of the Lost is the winner.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/books/authors/morrissey-list-of-the-lost-best-lines/

 

[lazybloke]

The Lazy household like to laugh at the pretentious food descriptions on Masterchef, especially for the more mundane ingredients.
Bonus points for anything described as 'foam'.

GBBO is going the same way.

 

[Blue Hills]

Let's run that up the flag pole and see who salutes.

While singing from the same hymn sheet

(Like wot they do in north korea*)

From the same period of waffle perhaps

* Remembers - working in what proclaimed itself to be the world's biggest PR company I had to, er, interface, with a prime peddlar of waffle. He was an ex communist, or so he said. Not altogether surprising perhaps. At one point he got rather annoyed with my, er, feedback, and accused me of being like adolf adolf hitler. True.

 

[Blue Hills]

Gin with hand foraged botanicals.

I never believe the hand foraged thing in a business of any size at all. I mean how can it be? One for trading standards methinks or whatever. Picked out of fields by east europeans bent double maybe. But hand f*** ed? I think not.

 

[Drago]

This thread has got me thinking. I had placed it on the back burner, but I'm now thinking of reaching out to the stakeholders and working towards a partnership based holistic solution to the safeguarding issues raised, and addressing the needs of the vulnerable violent junkie shoplifters.

 

[simonali]

Anything that is "curated" but not in either a museum or an art gallery.

What about an egg?

 

[Slioch]

Just thought of another one that makes my blood boil. "Jus".
Just WTAF is "Jus"?
It's gravy, ok!

 

[slowmotion]

Just thought of another one that makes my blood boil. "Jus".
Just WTAF is "Jus"?
It's gravy, ok!

Gravy is never "drizzled".
BTW, whatever happened to lard? Was it re-branded?

 

[Cycleops]

'Once Ripley strips to her underwear and becomes desirable, the alien - in stark contrast to the blinding speed of its earlier assaults - now stretches it's head out as if preening slowly and languorously. Drooling, its a sex scene. Ripley of course blows it away with an ejaculatory bolt from her massive gun.'

BFIs creative director Heather Stewart on Alien as a feminist narrative.
Observer.

 

[Cycleops]

 

[Grant Fondo]

View attachment 439972

Some abstract lateralism going on at Adidas HQ...either that or total b*llocks

 

[Cycleops]

And here is corker from the king of pretentiousness:
The genius of Del Toros creation is that we know exactly how much Elisa cares for her soulmate and how he makes silent sense of her fish out of water feelings. Watching them dance around each other I became aware of the shape of my own tears...

Mark Kermode
The Shape of Water
Observer.

 

[Grant Fondo]

And here is corker from the king of pretentiousness:
The genius of Del Toros creation is that we know exactly how much Elisa cares for her soulmate and how he makes silent sense of her fish out of water feelings. Watching them dance around each other I became aware of the shape of my own tears...

Mark Kermode
The Shape of Water
Observer.

Yeah thats what happens when you listen to too much Shawaddywaddy. Tit.

 

[Poacher]

View attachment 439972

Some abstract lateralism going on at Adidas HQ...either that or total b*llocks

This is not abstract lateralism. This is total b*llocks.

 

[Grant Fondo]

Look again at those soup cans and Brillo boxes. Their clean lines and simple shapes are ethereal, pure. The ordinary is sacred. Like a still life by Zurbaran, these everyday objects are transfigured by mysticism. Warhol painted Campbell’s soup for the soul.....

Either that or he was taking the p*ss