Odd factoids

[PeteXXX]

Michel Barnier once insisted that his lady friend wore a Dutch Cap in a Dutch Barn.

 

[Drago]

Barnier was born Michelle, and earned a living as a barnstormer and doing a bit of wing walking. However, when in 1238bc when he had the sex change and became Michael he found the people of Luton rather intolerant, so he went to live in France and francocised Michelle Barnstormer as Michel Barnier.

 

[PeteXXX]

He once stood in some cow poo and said "Ewwwwww"
Then thought that would be a better name than 'EEC'

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Pfizer was founded by Michelle Pfeiffer.

Michelle Pfeiffer is being given as the vaccine booster dose. Strangely there is 100% take up amongst middle aged men.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Michel Barnier was always known for leaving the barn door open. Hence the phrase “They’ve done a Barnier”. A barn door that is open was marked Brexit. Short for Barn Exit.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

The European Union is a most misunderstood organisation. It’s actually a union protecting the working rights of professional Europeans. The Morris Dancers of Britain and thigh slapping lederhosen Germans were the founders in 463 AD.

 

[ClichéGuevara]

There seems to be a lot of fake news about the origins Michel Barnier's name. It actually relates to building construction, and is the Franco equivalent of 'Gerry built'. Cette maison est plus Barnier que les autres .

 

[Drago]

Brexit came about entirely by accident. The British are notoriously bad for skipping breakfast, the most important meal of the day. In order to remedy this, and to improve slumping weetabix sales, Brussels started a "Brekk-it" campaign to get people eating breakfast again.

This was a wildly successful campaign, and there were soon calls to make breakfast a lawful requirement. It was put to national referendum. Unfortunately, this caused mass confusion and hordes of people accidentally voted for the similar sounding 'Brexit', which was having a referendum the same day.

This caused outrage among cornflakes manufacturers, who became known as remoaners. The fools that voted in error were labelled as 'breakfasteers'.

The whole breakfast farce became so bad that gammon quickly became a pejorative term and the eating of backon was banned. This resulted even fewer people eating breakfast than before.

The French Shreddies Breakfast Company collapsed, and its staff made rednundant. Angry staff responded by forming the Exit Rebellion, and started to glue themselves to traints and the M25 in order to delay commuters and give them more time tomeat breakfast. Of course, the bjzarre French accent was misunderstood and the groups name accidentally translated into English as extinction rebellion.

So successful was their blockade that should Germany ever try to invade France again it will be Extinction Rebellion sent to halt their advamce, not the French army...who's troops refuse to fight until theyve had breakfast.

 

[roubaixtuesday]

Lederhosen were first conceived as a training aid for professional cyclists.

Literally "Lead tights", these heavy-metal lined bib-shorts were used in training up climbs to strengthen the legs, and weighed 20kgs or more.

The Russians requested supplies for rescue workers at Chernobyl as gamma-radiation protection garments and their popularity never recovered as they became incorrectly associated with indecent exposure "Cher Knob'll fall out" as a result.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Michel Barnier once insisted that his lady friend wore a Dutch Cap in a Dutch Barn.

A Dutch cap is an orange cycling cap and worn by traditional cyclists on town bikes. More modern versions of the cap have reflectives for night time riding.

 

[twentysix by twentyfive]

Brexit came about entirely by accident. The British are notoriously bad for skipping breakfast, the most important meal of the day. In order to remedy this, and to improve slumping weetabix sales, Brussels started a "Brekk-it" campaign to get people eating breakfast again.

This was a wildly successful campaign, and there were soon calls to make breakfast a lawful requirement. It was put to national referendum. Unfortunately, this caused mass confusion and hordes of people accidentally voted for the similar sounding 'Brexit', which was having a referendum the same day.

This caused outrage among cornflakes manufacturers, who became known as remoaners. The fools that voted in error were labelled as 'breakfasteers'.

The whole breakfast farce became so bad that gammon quickly became a pejorative term and the eating of backon was banned. This resulted even fewer people eating breakfast than before.

The French Shreddies Breakfast Company collapsed, and its staff made rednundant. Angry staff responded by forming the Exit Rebellion, and started to glue themselves to traints and the M25 in order to delay commuters and give them more time tomeat breakfast. Of course, the bjzarre French accent was misunderstood and the groups name accidentally translated into English as extinction rebellion.

So successful was their blockade that should Germany ever try to invade France again it will be Extinction Rebellion sent to halt their advamce, not the French army...who's troops refuse to fight until theyve had breakfast.

The imagination gene no longer exists in the wild now as Professor @Drago has them all in his fiendish human engineering laboratory. H as one of his experiments gone wrong?

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Everyone thinks John Lennon wrote Imagine. However, it was written by Paul McCartney for his upcoming Wings album. The two fell out over it and several years later, Paul signed a non disclosure contract with John. However the term contract was misunderstood which led to the fateful shooting in 1980.

 

[Drago]

John Lennon faked his own death, and after a few years put planned to take the place of Jimmy Savile upon the latter's death. Unfortunately, all the dirty linen came out in the wash and Lennon had to invent the persona of Keith Lemon, deliberately choosing a similar sounding surname to prevent slip ups.

 

[roubaixtuesday]

Keith Lemon is the bastard love child of the ghost of William of Orange and Penelope Keith.

In turn, he became the lover of Bez of Black Grape and they named their adopted child Ruby Grapefuit.

 

[Drago]

The rather delicious posh totty, Penelope Keith, started out her career as a puppet for Keith Harris. After several months sat on Harris' lap with his hand up her bottom she quit to star in The Good Life, a documentary about posh people living next door to working class oiks.