I thought I'd update this thread now I've finally got my bike in case it helps someone else in a similar position.
What my wife and I ended up with bears no relation to what I set out to buy...
I borrowed a pure road bike, carbon frame, skinny tyres then hired a flat bar hybrid to get some idea of what each felt like.
I found that the dropped bars were actually more comfortable as I could change my hand positions as I got tired. But I was scared stiff of those narrow wheels on Dublin's potholed streets and the road bike just didn't feel "fun" enough.
I tried various local bike shops here in Dublin but the selection was poor and given it was the end of the season nobody seemed to have what I wanted in stock to see in the flesh. many seemed to be tied to a single obscure brand and wanted to sell me what they had, rather than what I wanted.
So we went the gravel bike route. Dropped bars and the capability for fatter tyres for greenways and thinner ones for road to be bought online from the UK.
After a month of research I ordered a Pinnacle Arkose 1 from
Evans for my wife and i ordered a
Ribble CGR Al for myself.
I ordered from Evans just before they were bought out so there was a delay in delivering but the Evans staff were A1, reassuring me along the way.
Ribble were a different story. I ordered the bike in late October and it finally arrived nearly three months later, squeezed into a carton smaller than the width of the bike so the derailleur was bent. I love the bike but Ribble are by far the worst company I've ever had to deal with for customer service. I'll put the gory details in a separate thread but Ribble is a disaster of a company. The only reason they communicated with me at all was that I made a fuss on Twitter and Facebook and only then to get me to shut up.
We're both delighted with our bikes now we have them, those chunky tyres and the slightly more upright seating position are great. My 1x11 gears are a dream to use, albeit the gear change is a little sloppy with a deformed derailleur but when Ribble finally deem to send me a new one, probably post Brexit, I'm sure things will settle down.