I'm an experienced cyclist, and an advanced trainer to the emergency services. There are too many jerks out there that know south of bugger all but still feel qualified to tell others what to do - BC ride leaders, and to a lesser extent CUK ones too are bad for this - so I tend to ride mainly on my own. By and large the only group riding I do is with other MIAs or IPMBA trainers. BC can be so bad that I'm refusing to allow my youngest to do Bikeability next school year, but because it's now in the syllabus I've had to flash my creds at the school and assure them that I'll be doing a better job myself (in fact, I already have done).
You may fare better with a more informal club or group aimed at ladies - perhaps a root through Facebook to see if there is a local group. Above all, don't feel intimidated - anyone that matters will be supportive of your efforts and genuinely interested in helping you along.