Give me some dialogue from your day

[Dave 123]

Tim- What's a suspended sentence?

Me- Hanging

Tim & Max- Silence.....

Me- Oh come on, that was a belter....!

Max- Oh, erm... yes. But.... it wasn't suspended in the same way....

Me- Silence (shaking head wearily)

 

[jhawk]

Not exactly dialogue from my day... But rather years ago!

My father used to tell me that when the ice cream van came around our area and rang his bell - that meant he was out of ice cream!

So, whenever the ice cream van would come around, and the bell would ring... All the other kids would run to him and get their ice cream. Meanwhile, there'd be me:

"Ow, Dad! He's out again!"

Apparently, he saved a fortune.

 

[Mattonsea]

Me " what did you have for Tea ?"
Child 2 " River Cobbler it was really nice chicken ??? "

 

[Lullabelle]

Someone at work: when will we get our payslips?
Me: next week (in my head I said 'can you give me a few minutes whilst I get my crystal ball warmed up'

 

[Lanzecki]

Customer "Why does it take 10 mins for my PC to start Outlook?"
Me "That's quite good you know. You have 35gb of email to open. Do you really need email from 2005?"
Customer "How do you know that off the top of your head?"
Me: "There's loads I know....." Ominous look, "And the server complains to me regularly when it tries to backup your mails. Take ten mins to clean it out once in a while huh?"

The conversation went down hill from here. Somthing along the lines of "I don't have time to housekeep, that's what you are for" and "but you are willing to wait 10 mins every time you start your outlook?,

 

[jhawk]

Customer "Why does it take 10 mins for my PC to start Outlook?"
Me "That's quite good you know. You have 35gb of email to open. Do you really need email from 2005?"
Customer "How do you know that off the top of your head?"
Me: "There's loads I know....." Ominous look, "And the server complains to me regularly when it tries to backup your mails. Take ten mins to clean it out once in a while huh?"

The conversation went down hill from here. Somthing along the lines of "I don't have time to housekeep, that's what you are for" and "but you are willing to wait 10 mins every time you start your outlook?,

As the son of an IT Tech... A roll of the eyebrows almost every few minutes from my father as the stupid questions pile up! He often says, "How did they get to work in a business where the use and basic knowledge of computers is an every-day occurrence?".

 

[Lanzecki]

As the son of an IT Tech... A roll of the eyebrows almost every few minutes from my father as the stupid questions pile up! He often says, "How did they get to work in a business where the use and basic knowledge of computers is an every-day occurrence?".

It's constant. I do have most customers well trained. But there will always be a few. The same company claims to not have any money for staff PC training, but has bought 14 new vehicles this year. I go looking for 5k for a new server for them, and there are screams of angst. Pitty some people don't realise the importance of their IT. But I'll get it in the neck if something dies.

 

[jhawk]

It's constant. I do have most customers well trained. But there will always be a few. The same company claims to not have any money for staff PC training, but has bought 14 new vehicles this year. I go looking for 5k for a new server for them, and there are screams of angst. Pitty some people don't realise the importance of their IT. But I'll get it in the neck if something dies.

I half expect to turn around one day, while on the phone and just say - in best Irish, "Excuse me. But are you from the past?"

 

[Lanzecki]

I half expect to turn around one day, while on the phone and just say - in best Irish, "Excuse me. But are you from the past?"

Nice one, but best not to say that here. I'll get reminded of the 800 years of oppression that some people take personally. "It wasn't my that was oppressing or you that was oppressed". To be fair sort of winge has died out, but once in a while I still get it. "Ya don't seem that old" is my response.

All that said, I wouldn't move back to the UK.

 

[Crackle]

Out walking the dog today...

Bloke: "Oh, he'll not come back now, does your dog come back?" he says as his dog chases off in pursuit of mine
Me: "Yep" Whistles and he turns immediately and heads back with blokes dog in pursuit "Still young is he?"
Bloke: "17 months and he's got as much sense as.....as much sense as my missus!" said in an exasperated tone
Me: Chortles and walks off shaking my head, thinking that's just too big to get into on a dog walk

 

[Scoosh]

Early morning wisdom !

 

[annedonnelly]

Out walking the dog today...

Bloke: "Oh, he'll not come back now, does your dog come back?" he says as his dog chases off in pursuit of mine
Me: "Yep" Whistles and he turns immediately and heads back with blokes dog in pursuit "Still young is he?"
Bloke: "17 months and he's got as much sense as.....as much sense as my missus!" said in an exasperated tone
Me: Chortles and walks off shaking my head, thinking that's just too big to get into on a dog walk

It's lovely to see well trained dogs - doesn't often happen though.

 

[gbb]

Vyga (Vegas to us), machine op, walks in this morning and says..
'Colin, the hotter is not working on the machine'

Me to colleague....
'I guess he means heater '

we walk through, the vertical welder isnt....welding.
We check the connections, check the heater Is indeed hot, it is.
'Just check the temp settings and times'
Last night, the machine was working, now the temp is set 20 degrees lower and the times are way off

Reset it all, re feed all the film, turn to my colleague and say...
'But it was alright last night'
Its our favourite sarcastic quote used when there is no explanation. The amount of times ops say that quite seriously...like it makes everything ok
its the most pointless statement...it may well have been ok last night...but its not now is it ?

 

[gbb]

As an extension of the above, an op said one day...
'But it was ok last night '

I turned to my colleague and said...
'ok, lets pretend its still last night...then everything will be ok wont it ?....problem solved'

 

[jhawk]

Me: "Planning to get some miles on the tyres tomorrow!"

Friend: "In Canada we say, "tires"."

Me: "WELL, YOU'RE WRONG!"