Families!

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C

Crackle

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User said:
the simple fact that you gave him money and the use of the Argos card shows in the past you trusted him, something must have happened other than not repaying you for him to act out of the character you knew...find that out and it might help to explain what happened/happening..
fair enough tell him no more money but at the end of the day he is your grandson, family and that should be what really matters...
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Gavroche is a poorly paid lecherer now.
 
OP
OP
gavroche

gavroche

Getting old but not past it
Location
North Wales
Let's clarify the situation a bit. The money is less than £500 and as far as the Argos card is concerned , I didn't let him use my card but he bought something on my card, promising to pay back monthly. I can afford to lose the money and pay his Argos bill but it is the mistrust and dishonesty on his part that hurts me. It won't happen again and it will take a long time before I accept him back. Being family doesn't mean taking advantage and getting away with it.
 
S

steve50

Disenchanted Member
Location
West Yorkshire
gavroche said:
What do you do when a member of your family won't pay back money you lent them?
This is currently what is happening to me. I lent my grand son some money last April and am still waiting for it back. When I asked him what he was going to do about it, his reply was: " Nothing" . He also bought some goods on my Argos card and stopped his monthly payments. Again, when I asked him when he was going to resume paying, his reply was: " Up yours!" You can guess I refuse to talk or see him now until he grows up and start behaving like a decent human being. By the way, he will be 26 next month.
Apparently, my wife says he is sorry for his behaviour but never said that to me. Tough!
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The lad(man, and I use the term loosely) is a totally disrespectful turd, if he treats you with such disdain and disrespect he no longer deserves your time or effort. You trusted him to "do the right thing" he abused your trust and then abused you when you tried to recover your money.
If you can get him to sit down and listen to you, tell him how upset you are that he has abused your trust, explain to him that he has a duty to repay what he has borrowed from you / spent on the store card and if he is willing to step up and make amends you can forgive and forget. If he then refuses to pay back or you get further abuse from him tell him you have no further desire to have anything to do with him nor will you ever try to help him out in the future, add to this you might well right him off completely and you do not want him coming anywhere near your door at anytime in the future.
What do his parents have to say about it, are they supportive of you or him, have they tried to make him see the error of his ways?
At the end of the day he will need you far sooner than you will ever need him, some "tough love" is required in this case.
 
Beebo

Beebo

Firm and Fruity
Location
Hexleybeef
What was discussed when you lent the money?
Did you agree repayment terms or just leave it open ended.
It is not uncommon for kids to recieve money with no intention of repaying.
If you are really bothered then change you will.
 
C

Crackle

..
Beebo said:
If you are really bothered then change you will
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Yoda wisdom
 
S

steve50

Disenchanted Member
Location
West Yorkshire
gavroche said:
What do you do when a member of your family won't pay back money you lent them?
This is currently what is happening to me. I lent my grand son some money last April and am still waiting for it back. When I asked him what he was going to do about it, his reply was: " Nothing" . He also bought some goods on my Argos card and stopped his monthly payments. Again, when I asked him when he was going to resume paying, his reply was: " Up yours!" You can guess I refuse to talk or see him now until he grows up and start behaving like a decent human being. By the way, he will be 26 next month.
Apparently, my wife says he is sorry for his behaviour but never said that to me. Tough!
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[QUOTE 4481402, member: 45"]What's wrong with saying that he was wrong to take your money and you're angry and disappointed, but you love him? I don't think I'd disown him for this.[/QUOTE]

I think @gavroche has already tried with his grandson but all he gets in return is abuse, you may well be more tolerant of that kind of behaviour but then neither you or I know the full circumstances of the situation, I think given what I have read I too would disown the grandson until such a time as he grows up and shows some remorse for the error of his ways, and volunteers to pay back what he owes with a heartfelt apology.
 
S

steve50

Disenchanted Member
Location
West Yorkshire
Gavroche has already approached his grandson wwith a view to making things right , asking him what he intends to do by way of paying off his debt, he got the response of "nothing" and "up yours" not very mature to say the least.Gavroche wife claims the grandson has apologised to her, is he not man enough to apologise to his grandad? Maybe the grandson should stop taking advantage of his grandparents generosity, man up and grow a pair and do right by his grandparents instead of taking the p#ss.
 
Freds Dad

Freds Dad

Veteran
Location
Gawsworth.
If the Grandson has purchase items on the OP's Argos card do the items belong to the OP? Could he go round and collect said items or threaten to collect which may encourage payment to be made?
 
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