Does everyone have an alibi for lunchtime 3 April?

[User]

 

[Milkfloat]

I was not driving a Mercedes if that was what you were asking? But then again, nor was the motorist in the story.

 

[Arjimlad]

I first heard of this tactic in about 1991 but the keys were handed within minutes to the next police officer the cyclist saw on his commute. I guess that this cyclist might still be waiting to see a police officer on his commute in Brighton in 2017.

 

[Deleted member 35268]

Lets get the Strava data and post it all over the forum

 

[glasgowcyclist]

Officers are keen to speak to the cyclist who is described as a white man, of slim build, with a beard.​

One of those features rules me out.
(No prize for guessing which.)

 

[confusedcyclist]

It was me!

Oh wait, no beard. Seriously though, I have fanticised about this tactic. Dropping it in a drain 10 yards up the road, still in view of the driver, would that still be theft?

 

[Deleted member 26715]

Officers are keen to speak to the cyclist who is described as a white man, of slim build, with a beard.​

One of those features rules me out.
(No prize for guessing which.)

Iz it becuz u'z Black?

 

[Saluki]

Well it won't be @vickster. She doesn't have a black bike. I do but was at home doing the hoovering

 

[glasgowcyclist]

It was me!

Oh wait, no beard. Seriously though, I have fanticised about this tactic. Dropping it in a drain 10 yards up the road, still in view of the driver, would that still be theft?

A friend and his brother witnessed (narrowly avoided) a driver who'd jumped a red light and crashed into a bollard late one evening. They left their car to help and found the other guy was totally plastered. My friend's brother punched the driver in the face and threw the car keys into a nearby field. (Not something I'd recommend.)

 

[glasgowcyclist]

Well it won't be @vickster. She doesn't have a black bike. I do but was at home doing the hoovering

And the beard? No, never mind, forget I mentioned it...

 

[Saluki]

And the beard? No, never mind, forget I mentioned it...

I forgot about the beard. Trying to do 3 things at once here. It might have been a disguise

 

[Deleted member 26715]

No mention of what the car driver did to suffer the wrath of the cyclist?

 

[confusedcyclist]

@Phaeton It's irrelevant because the cyclist lost the moral high ground. Oh, but all cyclists are tax and red light dodgers anyway.

 

[Deleted member 26715]

@Phaeton It's irrelevant because the cyclist lost the moral high ground. Oh, but all cyclists are tax and red light dodgers anyway.

Why did he/she, better to remove the keys than draw his pump & beat them to death with it

 

[Saluki]

It was me!

Oh wait, no beard. Seriously though, I have fanticised about this tactic. Dropping it in a drain 10 yards up the road, still in view of the driver, would that still be theft?

When I was 17, and not very brave, I had driving lessons with BSM and the instructor was horrible. He kept yelling at me. I do mean yelling. He said "If you mess the clutch up one more time I will hit you" and I stalled the car and he started yelling, so I grabbed the keys and threw them into the bushes and ran like hell.
My big brother rang BSM and sorted it out. I wasn't brave enough.