Any good jokes ... ?

[Cavalol]

I've taken a vowel of silnce.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

When the moon hits your knees
And you mispronounce trees
Sycamore!

On the banks of the Spey where steam trains run each day,
Aviemore

 

[Cavalol]

My last girlfriend was a sex object.


Every time I asked for sex, she objected.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

There's a warrior man comes from feudal Japan
That's Samurai

 

[PeteXXX]

When you're swimmin' in the creek
And an eel bites your cheek
That's a moray!

Posted 3 years ago.. How time flies!

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

I was feeling lonely so I bought some shares. It’s nice to have a bit of company.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[kynikos]

When your lens gives lines bends
And the pattern never ends
That's a moiré

 

[betty swollocks]

On Friday I got offered a job teaching poetry in a prison.
I spent all yesterday thinking about the prose and cons.

 

[betty swollocks]

There's a siege going on at the zoo. They've taken 3 ostriches.

The remainder are fighting a Rhea-guard action.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

Where does mercury come from?

HG Wells.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

I bought Neil Diamond's old Volvo on eBay...it was a Swede car on-line.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Cavalol]

<Apple Store>
"Good morning sir. How may I help you?"
"I'm returning this phone; the Faecal recognition doesn't work."
"Excuse me, don't you mean 'Facial'?"
"Oh! Erm... have you got a cloth?"

 

[Dayvo]