Any good jokes ... ?

[Dave7]

Sew did eye

I wish someone would explain it to me

 

[AndyRM]

I wish someone would explain it to me

I will ease your pain:

Spoiler

The bald guy at the back is Jean Luc-Picard whose catchphrase in Star Trek was "Make it so!"

The clown is a character called Pennywise from the film "It".

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

I wish someone would explain it to me

Captain Picard would give his orders by finishing "... make it so"

Pennywise the clown is the main character from the Stephen King book It, with the evil clown being the "It"

Therefore, Picard is saying "Make It Sew" in the picture.

 

[Profpointy]

I will ease your pain:

Spoiler

The bald guy at the back is Jean Luc-Picard whose catchphrase in Star Trek was "Make it so!"

The clown is a character called Pennywise from the film "It".

Thanks - I'd worked out the elements but had completely forgotten Jean-Luc Slaphead's rather good catchphrase. It was driving me nuts

 

[AndyRM]

Thanks - I'd worked out the elements but

That's 3 of affected by the issue contained in this thread.

There should be a number to call for help and support.

 

[Cavalol]

My wife left me because I ate too much chocolate over Christmas.

I think this calls for a Celebration.

 

[Chris S]

Why do Saudi Arabians get up early? So they don't get the ugly camels.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2...-beauty-contest-judges-get--hump-botox-cheats

 

[morrisman]

Therapist: 'So why do you want to end your marriage?'
Wife: 'I hate the constant Star Wars puns'
Husband: 'Divorce is strong with this one'

 

[betty swollocks]

I took the lift up The Shard earlier today and told the other passengers this joke. They all laughed.
It was understood on so many levels.

 

[AndyRM]

How do you know how heavy a chilli pepper is?

Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.

 

[Arjimlad]

Why will one penguin jump up & down when he meets another penguin?

To break the ice !

 

[Tim Hall]

How do you know how heavy a chilli pepper is?

Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.

Where's the best place to weigh a pie?

Somewhere over the rainbow.

 

[AndyRM]

How do you image manipulate a Jedi?

With Adobe Wan Kenobi.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?


It got stuck in a crack.

 

[Fonze]

For my wife's 40th she said she'd love a boob job , curious I asked why
"I'd like them big,round and be plenty there to grab hold of" she said ..
"Get some toilet paper, and where cleavage is and in between each boob rub for a while" I plumped up ..
"You think that will make them bigger ?" She quipped
"It should do, done wonders for your ar5e"