Any good jokes ... ?

[TVC]

umm, setup for a joke.


Who sang about tiger feet?

OK...

... I don't know, who sang Tiger Feet?

 

[screenman]

Boswolox then. I'm off to the pub.


grumble, mutter

That's right.

 

[welsh dragon]

Expert's say if you go out in icy conditions you should take the following.
Hat
Scarf
Gloves
Enough food to last 24 hours
Petrol
A blanket
Torch
A shovel
De-icer

I felt a right twat on the bus.

 

[raleighnut]

View: https://youtu.be/1Og9R_ewI6c

 

[NorthernDave]

My dog used to chase people on a bike.

It got so bad, I had to take the bike off him...

 

[Hitchington]

Trump joke

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
No-one has ever paid to have a lentil on their face...

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

The Pentagon are changing the nuclear release codes to over 140 characters.

So Trump can't tweet them.

 

[flake99please]

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a flying pig?





The letter 'F'

 

[screenman]

Trump joke

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
No-one has ever paid to have a lentil on their face...

Can you explain that one.

 

[flake99please]

I'm so angry with myself at the moment, because I cannot remember what 51, 6, & 500 are in Roman numerals.

I'm LIVID.

 

[TVC]

From a T shirt I believe

 

[welsh dragon]

Southerners have been advised not to venture out for the next 48 hours due to heavy snowfalls, ice, and blizzards with winds that could reach 60 miles per hour.

Northerners-you'll need your big coat

 

[swee'pea99]

Southerners have been advised not to venture out for the next 48 hours due to heavy snowfalls, ice, and blizzards with winds that could reach 60 miles per hour.

Northerners-you'll need your big coat

Apart from you Geordies - t-shirts as usual. Oh aye - well 'ard.

 

[TwickenhamCyclist]

Southerners have been advised not to venture out for the next 48 hours due to heavy snowfalls, ice, and blizzards with winds that could reach 60 miles per hour.

Northerners-you'll need your big coat

We're easy targets down here... but just remember us Southerners havn't had the benefit of your disadvantages...

 

[morrisman]

Why do Swedish warships have bar codes on the sides?

So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.