Any good jokes ... ?

[richardfm]

The CEO of a large company calls the Chief Scientist, the Chief Accountant and the Chief Engineer in to a meeting.
He says, I've got a little test for you. Tell me what's is 2+2.
The scientist says 4
The engineer says 4, near as damn it.
The accountant says, what would you like it to be?

 

[tyred]

 

[PeteXXX]

Now, that's clever stuff!! 😂

 

[newfhouse]

Lovejoy Division

 

[newfhouse]

Ian Jury

 

[tyred]

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Cavalol]

I used to DJ at illegal raves at Stonehenge and Avebury, but I don't mix in those circles any more.

 

[Cavalol]

Been offered a job at the fish counter in the local supermarket.


I dunno whether to take it, guess I need to weigh up the frozen prawns.

 

[tyred]

 

[craigwend]

 

[flopner]

A car full of Irish nuns is sitting at a traffic light in downtown Dublin, when a bunch of rowdy drunks pull up alongside of them.
"Hey, show us yer teets, ya bloody penguins!" shouts one of the drunks.
Quite shocked, Mother Superior turns to Sister Mary Immaculata and says, "I don't think they know who we are; show them your cross."
Sister Mary Immaculata rolls down her window and shouts, "Piss off, ya fookin' little self-gratification artists, before I come over there and rip yer balls off!"
Sister Mary Immaculata then rolls up her window, looks back at Mother Superior, quite innocently, and asks, "Did that sound cross enough?

 

[PeteXXX]

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[mistyoptic]

View attachment 704340

That’s not proper though. Should have a black stopper, not a metal screw cap