mistyoptic
Vintage
- Location
- A parallel reality
Any good jokes ... ?
- Thread starter cisamcgu
- Start date
Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.
Profpointy
Legendary Member
Meep meep !
Profpointy
Legendary Member
I'm sure I've posted this before but the picture reminds me of the story of a concert where the conductor phones up at the very last minute that he can't make it. The impresario is naturally panicking as the orchestra and audience are already in the seats, but at that moment a back desk violinist rushes in , and starts to apologise for being late, but the impresario has a brainwave and says "never mind all that, the conductor can't make it so you'll have to conduct the orchestra". "But I'm only a second violinist not a conductor". "Don't worry. You're already dressed up in white tie and tails, you know how it goes, so just count 'em in, keep beating time, maybe the odd flourish, then bow at the end". Fair enough he does his best and the concert is a great success.
Next night the regular conductor is back and the fiddle player is on time and in his usual seat, and his pal looks at him and says "where the hell were you last night?"
Toshiba Boy
N+1er
- Location
- By the beach, West Zummerzet
Chris S
Legendary Member
- Location
- Birmingham
mistyoptic
Vintage
- Location
- A parallel reality
ClichéGuevara
Legendary Member
- Location
- Kingston upon the River Hull
I can see why Jim doesn't want to come out of the closet. It looks quite cosy.
Last edited:
Nibor
Bewildered
- Location
- Accrington
A highways agency warning said anyone travelling in icy conditions should take a shovel, blankets, sleeping bag, extra clothing, including a scarf, hat, gloves, 24 hour supply of food and drink, de-icer, rock salt, torch, tow rope, petrol can, first aid kit and jump
leads. I looked a right knob on the bus this morning.
leads. I looked a right knob on the bus this morning.
Chris S
Legendary Member
- Location
- Birmingham
Boris holding a COBRA meeting
Last edited by a moderator:
In a shock move, the English Cricket Board have announced world tennis no.1 Novak Djokovic as temporary batting coach.
'We acknowledge he doesn't have a background in our sport' said a spokesman, 'but we couldn't overlook the fact it took Australia two weeks to get him out'.
'We acknowledge he doesn't have a background in our sport' said a spokesman, 'but we couldn't overlook the fact it took Australia two weeks to get him out'.
