I think my partner would prefer 'the wife' to 'my wife' or 'wife #2' I'm pretty sure we both refer to each other as 'the other half' from time to time - it's never occurred to me that it could be construed as demeaning.
A friend of mine refers to his wife, his third, as the "current Mrs
Evans". You can see why he's been divorced twice.
Both my wife and I find the whole fuss about Christmas presents for each other a huge hassle so for the past five years or more we have agreed not to bother. Not romantic but tbh we are comfortably off and spend our money on what we want when we want it throughout the year, and we both admitted that we were often getting each other presents that we would not have chosen for ourselves, and which subsequently were not used. We try and make more of an effort for birthdays.
Even when we bought each other presents we hated the commercialism of Christmas and had agreed to spend no more than £25 on each other.