That reminds me of the old chestnut about the potato king:
The Potato King was sick of his three princess daughters moping around the palace so he summoned them to his chamber.
(Pam Ayers rustic accent here) “Daughters,” he commanded, “It's time for you to get married. Go out and find yourselves a suitable potato husband and report back to me one year from now.”
A year passed and the three daughters returned to tell their father how they had got on.
“My first daughter… tell me who you married!”
“Well Father,” replied the first daughter, “ I met a lovely Jersey Royal and I married him!”
“Very good! Very good!” chortled the Kind proudly. “Daughter number two?”
“Ooh Father, I met a lovely King Edward and I married him!”
“Excellent! Excellent!” smiled the King. “Now, daughter number three – how did you get on?"
(Sad voice here) “Well Father, I’m afraid I must disappoint you. I married….. I married.... Des Lynam”
“Des Lynam? Des Lynam?” shouted the King, enraged. “He’s just a common tater!”