Most football clubs have stopped allowing ashes to be scattered on their pitches due to the sheer collective amount. Mind you Accringto Stanley might not have that problem.
Pre paid funeral?
- Thread starter davidphilips
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- Location
- London
The catholic church has long been iffy about cremation, even after they loosened up a bit after the pope the Italians call "The Good Pope".
But then Pope Francis pretty recently decided that this had all gone a bit far/out of control/out of the church's control and announced that ashes should be entrusted to a church/graveyard/holy place - can't be having folk having them at home or scattered in some sentimental place - a hillside, the sea etc.
https://edition.cnn.com/2016/10/25/europe/cremation-vatican-scattering/index.html
So good catholics should of course entrust their cadavers to God's supreme care:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56184348
(I've been to Camogli, very fond memories of chilling in a harbour-side bar there - easy train ride from Genova - didn't explore the cemetery)
But then Pope Francis pretty recently decided that this had all gone a bit far/out of control/out of the church's control and announced that ashes should be entrusted to a church/graveyard/holy place - can't be having folk having them at home or scattered in some sentimental place - a hillside, the sea etc.
https://edition.cnn.com/2016/10/25/europe/cremation-vatican-scattering/index.html
So good catholics should of course entrust their cadavers to God's supreme care:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56184348
(I've been to Camogli, very fond memories of chilling in a harbour-side bar there - easy train ride from Genova - didn't explore the cemetery)
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numbnuts
Legendary Member
- Location
- Gone over the hill and far away
Accy cyclist
Legendary Member
- Location
- The hills of Accrington
I'll revive this thread as if i start a new one it'll be more for the Personal Matters section than the Cafe. I went to see my friend who died suddenly 9 days ago today. The funeral director wouldn't let me look at him as they said "He's deteriorated a lot in the last day and maybe it's best to remember him when he was alive and well". I'm happy with that! If i hadn't made an attempt i'd be thinking for the rest of my life "Why didn't you go and see him"?. I now know that seeing him wasn't possible and if i had been allowed to see him it would've been an upsetting sight that would play on my mind,possibly for the rest of my life. Thanks for reading this,as i can't say this to anyone i know as they'll think it a bit odd and maybe ghoulish.
Accy cyclist
Legendary Member
- Location
- The hills of Accrington
I;d also like to add that i'm a bit nervous about his funeral tomorrow. It's a Catholic service. I've never been to a Catholic funeral service or any of their services for that matter. I've been told they last for over an hour. Have any of you attended one and how long do they last?
Rocky
Hello decadence
Well done for trying to see him Accy. That takes bravery. I'm sorry you've lost a friend - it must be a difficult time for you.
Good luck with the funeral. Don't worry about being emotional. It's normal and will help you grieve his loss. I can't advise on catholic funerals, as I don't think I've ever been to one.
Accy cyclist
Legendary Member
- Location
- The hills of Accrington
Thanks for that Rocky! It's been playing on my mind for days about going to see him. I just happened to be in the area of the funeral home and thought it best to at least try to see him. As i said,if i hadn't made an effort i'd feel bad.
numbnuts
Legendary Member
- Location
- Gone over the hill and far away
If it is a full Requiem Mass it can be about an hour long as it is the normal Sunday Mass with communion plus the Requiem part, been to loads but nothing to be nervous by.................................. as your not in the coffin
Accy cyclist
Legendary Member
- Location
- The hills of Accrington
Serious question! I'm not expected to do all that sign of the cross stuff am i? I don't even sing at funerals,i just mime. My friend who's coming with me is a devout Irish Catholic,so maybe i won't get away with just miming.If it is a full Requiem Mass it can be about an hour long as it is the normal Sunday Mass with communion plus the Requiem part, been to loads but nothing to be nervous by.................................. as your not in the coffin
ColinJ
Puzzle game procrastinator!
- Location
- Todmorden - Yorks/Lancs border
My younger sister was with our mum when she died, the other had seen her the day before. I had spent the previous 24 hours at mum's bedside. My older sister persuaded the younger one to take her to the funeral home for a 'last goodbye' - they both regretted going! I was glad that I hadn't gone. I couldn't see the benefit of viewing a dead body, when I had already said goodbye to the living person.
newts
Veteran
- Location
- Isca Dumnoniorum
This happened to me, I used to dig graves when i was an apprentice, a very sobering experience!I worked with a former gravedigger once. He dug one plot out and ended up standing inside a coffin that had been buried below many years before... (The rotten lid of the coffin collapsed with the weight of him standing on the soil above it.)
We had our mum's funeral last week, organising was pretty straight forward & for me part of accepting she'd gone.
She had a saving plan that paid out when she was 85 (8 years ago) & the money had beeen deposited in a separate account.
The granchildren get a decent wedge with whats left over.
KnittyNorah
Über Member
- Location
- The Frozen North (of England)
Don't worry about it. There's a minimum of participation expected of you - stand up and sit down when the people in front of you do. Don't go up to the front at all - that's for the Mass bit - and just dress and act quietly and respectfully.
I went to a full requiem mass thing for a friend's mother - and I'm an atheist. Her hairdresser, who was very fond of her and had visited her weekly for several years, was Chinese in her 40's, and a ... Confucian? Buddhist? I dunno, but no sort of Xtian heritage at all ... asked if she could come with me. I just told her, sombre clothes, and we'd sit near the back. I ended up being a sort of 'leader' of quite a large group of non-Xtian people who were fond of my friend's mum and wanted to say their goodbyes; I had more in common with them than with the black, white and brown Xtian people who knew what it was all about wherever they were from originally! The priest was very sweet and made a point, as we went out, of thanking us for coming to 'say goodbye'.
Accy, sorry about the loss of your friend.Serious question! I'm not expected to do all that sign of the cross stuff am i? I don't even sing at funerals,i just mime. My friend who's coming with me is a devout Irish Catholic,so maybe i won't get away with just miming.
Just to add on to other's comments on Catholic funeral may or may not include full requiem mass which may even go up to 2 hrs. If your friend and his family are practising Catholics, then it will go the full distance.
There is absolutely nothing to participate in. You can sit quietly thru the entire proceedings without saying anything or singing anything or even kneeling down. Catholics will know that you have come to pay respect. If it is full requiem mass you will see people queuing up to receive communion. No need to get up. Best to take a corner away from the central aisle to avoid those who have to go to receive communion.
I found it immensely satisfying to sit thru and recall the memories during the proceedings.
numbnuts
Legendary Member
- Location
- Gone over the hill and far away
Serious question! I'm not expected to do all that sign of the cross stuff am i? I don't even sing at funerals,i just mime. My friend who's coming with me is a devout Irish Catholic,so maybe i won't get away with just miming.
Hi, no you don't have to do the sign of the cross ect, but to show a little respect kneel when they do and try and take part, not every one that goes to a Catholic funeral is a Catholic so you won't be the only one.
