Oh no I think I love my bike

[Accy cyclist]

Don't get caught.

"Sheriff Colin Miller also placed Stewart on the Sex Offenders Register for three years.

Mr Stewart was caught in the act with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr.

Gail Davidson, prosecuting, told Ayr Sheriff Court: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.

"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white t-shirt, naked from the waist down.

"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."

Both cleaners, who were "extremely shocked", told the hostel manager who called police."





I don't now why this became a police matter. He was basically having a J Arthur Rank in the privacy of a room he'd paid for. He wasn't doing it in view of the public.
Unless they thought the bike hadn't consented or something.

 

[snorri]

Can't say I really love any of my bikes,

That's what happens when you have more than one bike, split loyalty, not enough love to go round.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

That's what happens when you have more than one bike, split loyalty, not enough love to go round.

Don't forget the cat
How many bikes have you got @snorri?

 

[Nigelnaturist]

That's what happens when you have more than one bike, split loyalty, not enough love to go round.

That will be why I am struggling even contemplating a new bike.

 

[snorri]

Don't forget the cat
How many bikes have you got @snorri?

Just three.

 

[Wolf616]

Has anyone else noticed some cyclists who appear to explore their anal cavity with the front of the saddle when stopped at traffic lights? I don't know if it's just the people on my commute, but it's very off-putting.

Don't get me wrong I'm an open minded chap and am all for any type of (consensual) love & lust, but doing that at a traffic light seems a bit excessive. Holding the handlebars lovingly? Sure. Even a quick stroke of the headset is fine by me in public. I have to draw the line at full penetration though, even if it is through fabric.

 

[Gravity Aided]

And in public, no less.
We have to guard the children
from sights such as this,
lest they think it normal behavior.

 

[Starchivore]

I think I love Tegan & Sara but I guess that's besides the point?

......What were we talking about again?