Obituary errors (genuine if possible)
- Thread starter Dave7
- Start date
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Profpointy
Legendary Member
There's the story of Dai Evans, a farmer from Cardiganshire. His widow organises the notice in the Cambrian News, and since such things are priced per-word, in accordance with her late husband's great care with money, as befitting his status as a Cardi farmer, opts for the bare minimum of four words "Dai Evans is dead". The staff at the paper had actually been quite fond of old Dai, so they had a whip round, and said to Mrs Evans she could have 3 more words. "That's very kind of you" she replied, then thought for a moment to choose the words wisely
"Dai Evans is dead; tractor for sale"
"Dai Evans is dead; tractor for sale"
Alex321
Guru
- Location
- South Wales
Given the reputation Cardis have in Wales (my wife is from Cardiganshire), that could even be true.
The husband of a lately departed Yorkshire lady asked for her headstone to be engraved with the words "Lord, she were Thine". When the headstone was delivered it read "Lord, she were thin". "You have forgotten the "E"" said the distraught husband, and the offending stone was removed and returned a few days later, this time reading "E Lord, she were thin"!
Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
“Age 35, died peacefully at home on November 25 after complications from a radioactive spider bite that led to years of crime-fighting and a years long battle with a nefarious criminal named Cancer, who has plagued our society for far too long.
Civilians will recognize him best as Spider-Man, and thank him for his many years of service protecting our city.
His family knew him only as a kind and mild-mannered Art Director, a designer of websites and t-shirts and concert posters who always had the right cardigan and the right thing to say (even if it was wildly inappropriate).
Aaron was known for his long, entertaining stories, which he loved to repeat often.
In high school, he was in the band ‘The Asparagus Children’, which reached critical acclaim in the northern suburbs.
As an adult, he graduated from the College of Visual Arts (which also died an untimely death recently) and worked in several agencies around Minneapolis, settling in as an Interactive Associate Creative Director at Colle + McVoy.
Aaron was a comic book aficionado, a pop-culture encyclopedia and always the most fun person at any party.
He is survived by his parents, Bill and Kim Kuhlmeyer, father Mark Purmort (Patricia, Autumn, Aly), sisters Erika and Nicole, first wife Gwen Stefani, current wife Nora and their son Ralph, who will grow up to avenge his father’s untimely death.”
Civilians will recognize him best as Spider-Man, and thank him for his many years of service protecting our city.
His family knew him only as a kind and mild-mannered Art Director, a designer of websites and t-shirts and concert posters who always had the right cardigan and the right thing to say (even if it was wildly inappropriate).
Aaron was known for his long, entertaining stories, which he loved to repeat often.
In high school, he was in the band ‘The Asparagus Children’, which reached critical acclaim in the northern suburbs.
As an adult, he graduated from the College of Visual Arts (which also died an untimely death recently) and worked in several agencies around Minneapolis, settling in as an Interactive Associate Creative Director at Colle + McVoy.
Aaron was a comic book aficionado, a pop-culture encyclopedia and always the most fun person at any party.
He is survived by his parents, Bill and Kim Kuhlmeyer, father Mark Purmort (Patricia, Autumn, Aly), sisters Erika and Nicole, first wife Gwen Stefani, current wife Nora and their son Ralph, who will grow up to avenge his father’s untimely death.”
steveindenmark
Legendary Member
Mr Lindleys dying wish was that Mrs Lindley walks over his grave.
He is being interred at sea on Saturday.
He is being interred at sea on Saturday.
Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
"I told you this
would happen"
Philip Dayton Thorpe, born in Salt Lake City, April 1, 1934, to Ward R. & Phyllis Dayton Thorpe, and whose birth probably marked the beginning of April Fools' Day, died April 10, 2018, from causes related to life-long obesity and sleeping standing up. His grave marker will read "This corpse, is Phil Thorpe's."
Clod, as he was called even by those who knew his name, lived such a boring life that watching paint dry caused him to hyperventilate. His accomplishments will be published at a later date, if any are discovered. He served as an artillery officer in the U.S. Army. Canada wouldn't take him because, so they said, they don't go to war much up there. He served 3 missions for the LDS Church but they stopped sending him because he always came back. He picked up 3 University degrees along the way, two of which he had to return.
He was superceded in death by several billion people and is survived by his beloved wife of 55 years, Linda (Bird). She knew that she had married way beneath herself as they honeymooned at the SL County land-fill. She gave him six wonderful children-one at a time: Devin (Gail), Tiffany (Henry) Black, Natalie (John) Child, Jeremy (Angela), Bricker (Bridgett), and Christian (Ciara). They, in turn, provided 7 grandchildren, Dayton, Adam, Avery, Allie, Katlyn, Emerson and Sophie, along with 7 step-grandchildren, Riachle, Reagen, Courtney, Catie, Markessa (David), Alyssa (Eric) and Dalton, and 5 step-great grandchildren Alexander, Israel, Natalia, Yesenia and Avayha-Lynne. Also, his younger brother Scott (Kathy) Thorpe, sisters Shanna Baggaley and Patricia (Dick) Winzenried, all outlived him.
In keeping with one of society's morbid mores, there will be a wee wake Sunday evening for twenty minutes and for six minutes before the funeral the following day.
The price of admission to each of these events is one can of food, for his wife to whom he left nearly nothing. Burial will be in his backyard beside the dog his wife would never let him have.
would happen"
Philip Dayton Thorpe, born in Salt Lake City, April 1, 1934, to Ward R. & Phyllis Dayton Thorpe, and whose birth probably marked the beginning of April Fools' Day, died April 10, 2018, from causes related to life-long obesity and sleeping standing up. His grave marker will read "This corpse, is Phil Thorpe's."
Clod, as he was called even by those who knew his name, lived such a boring life that watching paint dry caused him to hyperventilate. His accomplishments will be published at a later date, if any are discovered. He served as an artillery officer in the U.S. Army. Canada wouldn't take him because, so they said, they don't go to war much up there. He served 3 missions for the LDS Church but they stopped sending him because he always came back. He picked up 3 University degrees along the way, two of which he had to return.
He was superceded in death by several billion people and is survived by his beloved wife of 55 years, Linda (Bird). She knew that she had married way beneath herself as they honeymooned at the SL County land-fill. She gave him six wonderful children-one at a time: Devin (Gail), Tiffany (Henry) Black, Natalie (John) Child, Jeremy (Angela), Bricker (Bridgett), and Christian (Ciara). They, in turn, provided 7 grandchildren, Dayton, Adam, Avery, Allie, Katlyn, Emerson and Sophie, along with 7 step-grandchildren, Riachle, Reagen, Courtney, Catie, Markessa (David), Alyssa (Eric) and Dalton, and 5 step-great grandchildren Alexander, Israel, Natalia, Yesenia and Avayha-Lynne. Also, his younger brother Scott (Kathy) Thorpe, sisters Shanna Baggaley and Patricia (Dick) Winzenried, all outlived him.
In keeping with one of society's morbid mores, there will be a wee wake Sunday evening for twenty minutes and for six minutes before the funeral the following day.
The price of admission to each of these events is one can of food, for his wife to whom he left nearly nothing. Burial will be in his backyard beside the dog his wife would never let him have.
Dave 123
Legendary Member
- Location
- Cambridgeshire alps
@Dave7
Here’s a Wirral link and a grave error link for you
View: https://youtu.be/ZKQqY3TMA1w?si=kgHgfJRdRFQA2a53
Here’s a Wirral link and a grave error link for you
View: https://youtu.be/ZKQqY3TMA1w?si=kgHgfJRdRFQA2a53
Hover Fly
Lazy so and so
- Location
- Besides the lake, beneath the trees
My father’s death notice in the local comic read:-”fiends please meet at the cemetery “.
