My friend is a bastard.........

[Arch]

Oh, and Betty, if you want to up the ante a bit, return the envelope with a card, but add glitter. Much harder to get out of the carpet.

 

[laurence]

The ultimate chads were from Datek keyboards - again in the early 80s. Miniscule circles that never seemed to get cleared away!

were they a form of Telex machine?

 

[goo_mason]

he's sent me a letter and filled it full of these:-

[ATTACH=full]159073[/ATTACH]..........little circles from a hole punch.
I'm now plotting my revenge.
ps The big white thing is my mighty mouse
pps I ought to do something about my avatar too.*

We once filled a workmate's umbrella with the contents of about 6 hole-punches and rolled it up again. He knew nothing about it for weeks, until the day he stepped out of his flat to find it was raining and put his brolly up - and was then promptly snowed upon with paper 'snow'

 

[red_tom]

No, you are thinking of Didcots - the little pieces punched out of tickets by railway ticket inspectors. At the wedding of Princess Margaret, the confetti consisted of thousands of didcots....

TMOL is online here

 

[betty swollocks]

Well, well, well: Chads and didcots eh?
My bastard friend is single, self-employed and lives three hundred and sixty six miles away.
Please keep the suggestions for my revenge coming!

 

[Dave5N]

Sign him up for lots of Junk Mail.

At one time (some years ago) I was getting about 30 copies of The Plain Truth each month.

Addressees include Mr Josef Stalin and V I Lenin, Esq.

 

[abchandler]

I was at a shared student house some years back about when the government first started producing explanatory leaflets in 15 different languages. We filled endless afternoons applying for different language versions in all sorts of names. We even had a follow up phone call from some department asking to speak to a Mr Wih-nih Thapu

 

[Jaded]

Freeze a can of expanding foam.
Drill a hole in it.
Express courier it to his place of work.

 

[Arch]

I was at a shared student house some years back about when the government first started producing explanatory leaflets in 15 different languages. We filled endless afternoons applying for different language versions in all sorts of names. We even had a follow up phone call from some department asking to speak to a Mr Wih-nih Thapu

Tom and I once filled a consumer survey in for a laugh at one of our student houses and we got a deluge of catlogues for sex-toys, and a 'lucky amulet' in a letter addressed to Ms A Rcher, and which proceede to then call me Rcher, all the way through....

 

[buggi]

we once put those clippings in someone's brolly. they stuck to him coz he was wet (he deserved it, he was the office wind up merchant)

 

[gambatte]

Nuke him from space, its the only way to be sure...

 

[papercorn2000]

Wait until he's gone to his work, break into the house and spread a can of anchovies on the sofa. Then torch the sofa. And his house. Go to his place of work and shoot all his workmates. Round up all of his friends and kill them. Round up all his family and kill them. Kill his dog. Drive a steam roller over his car. Kill the guy who runs the shop where he buys the papers and milk.
Them cut off his arms and feet. Put out his eyes and tear out his tongue. That should just about show him that you are not to be messed with.

 

[Twenty Inch]

Yay! Papercorn is back!!

 

[betty swollocks]

Wait until he's gone to his work, break into the house and spread a can of anchovies on the sofa. Then torch the sofa. And his house. Go to his place of work and shoot all his workmates. Round up all of his friends and kill them. Round up all his family and kill them. Kill his dog. Drive a steam roller over his car. Kill the guy who runs the shop where he buys the papers and milk.
Them cut off his arms and feet. Put out his eyes and tear out his tongue. That should just about show him that you are not to be messed with.

Thanks for the suggestion(s). I'm surprised at your moderation.

 

[alecstilleyedye]

is he on prozac?