Give me some dialogue from your day

[mistyoptic]

“The train will depart very shortly after arriving. Please be ready to get off before the train stops”

Hmm!

 

[cyberknight]

2 texts from my sister friday night

Are you awake ?

Mums had a fall , waiting for ambulance

 

[gbb]

couple years ago I gave a homeless fella £5, it was Christmas, he was polite and engaging, just looked down on his luck.
Some months later I saw he was jailed for harassing people.
Saw him last week in the same spot, quite clearly suffering from drug addiction, lost teeth, incredibly haggard. Sad to see what life throws at some people.

 

[Gillstay]

couple years ago I gave a homeless fella £5, it was Christmas, he was polite and engaging, just looked down on his luck.
Some months later I saw he was jailed for harassing people.
Saw him last week in the same spot, quite clearly suffering from drug addiction, lost teeth, incredibly haggard. Sad to see what life throws at some people.

An people think that jailing people works. Sad to see.

 

[rvw]

I walk into a local solicitor's office.

Me: I need to get a copy of my passport certified. Is that possible?
Receptionist: Oh, you need a solicitor for that.
Me: (Looks round at window with the sign 'Solicitor' plainly in it. Looks back at receptionist.) This is a solicitor's office, isn't it?
Receptionist: Nobody's in today.
Me: (Leaves in silence, shaking head.)

 

[sevenfourate]

My Boss at 9am via WhatsApp (After I’d started at 5am and everyone else at 6am):

“I’ll be in late: got to do something in Town”………

My Boss at 10.30am:

“I’m going to take the Morning off - see you all this afternoon”…….

My Boss at midday:

“I think I’m coming down with a cold (Oh right - the one most of us have had for 1-2 weeks now ?) - so I won’t be in today”……

Yea. See ya 🤦‍♂️

 

[Andy in Germany]

The dialogues most people here seem to have are a bit different to mine. Last weeks was typical. Colleague comes in, we'll call her Julia, verycompetent and very professional and far better organised than me. It's early in the day and we're the only staff in the building.

Julia: Good morning.
AinG: Good morning
Julia: How was your Weekend?
AinG: Not too bad. Yours?
Julia: Okay. By the way, could you come and check Herr _____________ I think he may be pished...

 

[colly]

In the dentist earlier:

Dentist: just a scale and polish is it?

Me: Ahnnngg.

Dentist: No problems since the last visit?

Me: Ahnnng.

Dentist: Good good. Still using the interdental brushes?

Me: Ahnnng.

Dentist: Good good. Just speak up if it gets uncomfortable.

Me: Ahnnng.


I feel we are beginning to bond somehow.

 

[Gwylan]

Cycling cycle path, come to cross a road at a T junction.
Road clear. Then some sort of battle cruiser comes round a bend just before the T junction. I am not going to win any battle with this thing. Brake and move to pass behind the SUV as it judders to a halt at the junction.
Really to myself I muse aloud about where the fire might be.
A stream of invective and abuse follows me from the female driver. Certainly not a lady.
Including the usual unimaginative use of a four letter word. I should look where I am going, how dare I be out cycling, fishing ( I think she said) scruffy old git.
Probably in a hurry to get Tamsin to her origami lessons.

 

[PaulSB]

"Of course things are much easier since they moved into the chateau"

Overheard in Dunham Massey.............Cheshire!

 

[ColinJ]

In the dentist earlier:

Dentist: just a scale and polish is it?

Me: Ahnnngg.

Dentist: No problems since the last visit?

Me: Ahnnng.

Dentist: Good good. Still using the interdental brushes?

Me: Ahnnng.

Dentist: Good good. Just speak up if it gets uncomfortable.

Me: Ahnnng.


I feel we are beginning to bond somehow.

Ha ha!

I am sure that dentists are contracted to push those brushes.

When I started at my current dentist about 6 years ago, dentist #1 demonstrated interdental brush brand A. Next time, dentist #2, brand A, then hygienist, brand A. The same every visit...

(Break for pandemic)

Back again, dentist #1, brand B. Next time, dentist #2, brand B, 3rd visit, hygienist brand B!

 

[Chris S]

I heard a well-spoken women with a slight German accent say that she couldn't be arsed upgrading her phone. I don't think she learnt that at her language classes.

 

[Gwylan]

I heard a well-spoken women with a slight German accent say that she couldn't be arsed upgrading her phone. I don't think she learnt that at her language classes.

I was told that is really awful to swear in a foreign language.

 

[All uphill]

I was told that is really awful to swear in a foreign language.

Learning new ways of expressing oneself forcefully ( ie swearing) is the best bit of studying another language!

After pillow talk.

 

[All uphill]

"Just cut the sandwiches in half, that way they'll go twice as far.