Give me some dialogue from your day

[Lullabelle]

My start time is 8.30, today I got to work about 8.20, the FD walked up to me:

FD: oh bl**dy hell, I was getting worried, 8.15 and you weren't here
ME: oh yes it's Thursday, shall I put the coffee pot on
FD: please if you wouldn't mind

The FD and MD were both in and I jokingly said to TVC, maybe I should take in a pint of milk, didn't bother. I had to go to the shop to get some, next week I will take a pint in with me.

 

[Saluki]

Overheard while waiting for the lift to lug a couple of guitars and an amp up to the 3rd floor.

Woman 1: that big bike race is on again
Woman 2: will they be shutting all the roads again, like last year.
W1: only in france
W2: It's dangerous, they fall off and graze themselves
W1: You'd think that they would send them one at a time and then they wouldn't have to close the roads for so long and they wouldn't bump into each other
W2: they do go one at a time sometimes.....
W2..... they should to that all the time


Happily the lift then went 'ping' and arrived

 

[Dave 123]

Overheard while waiting for the lift to lug a couple of guitars and an amp up to the 3rd floor.

Woman 1: that big bike race is on again
Woman 2: will they be shutting all the roads again, like last year.
W1: only in france
W2: It's dangerous, they fall off and graze themselves
W1: You'd think that they would send them one at a time and then they wouldn't have to close the roads for so long and they wouldn't bump into each other
W2: they do go one at a time sometimes.....
W2..... they should to that all the time


Happily the lift then went 'ping' and arrived

Yeah, but that's Norwich......

 

[welsh dragon]

Phones rings.

Me. "Yes this is.......speaking."

Them."this is x independent research company.

Me."No thanks." Puts phone down.

Mr WD." Who was that".

Me. " a research company".

MR WD. " did they want to do research on your body"

Me. " if they do, they'll have to wait a few years. I haven't finished using it yet".

 

[Saluki]

Yeah, but that's Norwich......

True but one of them had a weird accent from up North somewhere.

 

[Dave 123]

True but one of them had a weird accent from up North somewhere.

The Wash?

 

[Saluki]

The Wash?

More Norther than that. Yorkshire or Lancashire. The taller one sounded like my Sis in Law so quite a bit North of The Wash

 

[ColinJ]

(Not a dialogue because the child involved didn't actually respond to me, but I thought it was funny so here it is ...)

I was cycling through Hebden Bridge park an hour ago and a small boy was riding towards me. He was about 5 years old and pretty wobbly on his bike. Suddenly, he fell off, and landed heavily on the tarmac path ...

Boy: Ow, ow, ow!

ColinJ: Are you ok?

No reply. I expected the boy to start howling, and looked around for his parents. No sign of them.

He did not seem to be hurt so I rode past him and went on my way.

Behind me, the boy came up with the perfect post-crash question:

Grumpy boy: Oh why did I decide to ride my silly bike TODAY!

 

[Saluki]

Strange Bloke by a GoGo Dragon: Are you a cyclist
Us - standing by our bikes, we are dressed in lycra
Me: Yes
SBbGGD: My son's got a bike, better than yours
Me: Oh, that's nice (trying to take pic of Hubster by GGD)
SBbGGD: He had to get a mortgage out for his bike. It's so good it was £37,000.
Me: Oh, that's nice
SBbGGD: It's carbon fibre. Not like your bike
Me: Mine is carbon fibre
SBbGGD: His is for racing. He does road racing. His bike only weighs 2lbs. Your's is much fatter. Yours is a Mountain Bike
Me: Riiiiigggghhht
SBbGGD: Started extolling Son's bike blah de blah de blah
Hubs: Oh, is that the time. We have to go and catch a train. Bye

Us: Pedal pedal pedal 100 yards down the road
Hubs: What a pratt he was.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

I was in a lift at Heathrow T5 today (not protesting).

Taxi driver 1 (on seeing another taxi driver he knew): Hello, how are you getting?

Taxi driver 2: oh you know, up and down.

I chortled to myself...

 

[gbb]

Ken Barlow is giving his speech for Deidre's funeral...
'I just wish I could hear Deidries booming laugh one more time'

I looked at the wife and grinned, pulling my neck tendons tight, Deidrie style and laughed...

'Show some respect' said the wife, she's dead.
'Its not real, its TV' I said.
'It is real, she really is dead'
'I know, but this is TV, this is Coronation Street'

She hesistaed...and said,
'Yebbut, shes still dead'..she said with a slightly fustrated air'

 

[gbb]

Its hard working in a relatively cramped workshop, new spares, old but re-useable parts, tool cabinets, machinery being serviced, stored etc etc...it can get a real cr@phole real quick. I try to keep my part of the bench clear, does my head in when its messy, although I'm not perfect...
I swept some stuff off the bench onto the floor in a fit of pique..
'Bloody crap, I can't work like this'
'Whats going on'..asked the engineering manager.
'Crap all over the bench, does my head in'..I said pointedly in the hope colleagues will try to work tidier...bit pointless really cos one of them is a scruffy get, just dumps anything anywhere.
I continued....
'Tell you what, when we get new premises (next year)..I want us to have our own benches, then we'll see who's the messy gits, fcuk help anyone who puts their crap on my bench'

Later, boss is talkong about our prospective new premises and workshops...
'I think we will have our own benches, I quite like the idea'

Sorted....seed is sown.

 

[jhawk]

Today, I was waiting outside a petrol station to be picked up.

A car pulled up into one of the disabled spots, and stopped. I recognised the driver, someone I knew - not necessarily a friend, but someone I knew. He had been involved in an RTC in the early hours of New Year's Day. It was a hit and run, that RTC killed a friend of mine - and injured him and another passenger. He gets out of the car and grabs his crutch and walks into the store to get something.

"You alright mate?" I ask as he goes by.

"I've been better." He says as he walks in.

I hold the door open for him on his way out.

"On the mend?" I ask.

"Yeah, the doctors said I should be able to walk normally pretty soon."

I reflect for a second on how lucky I am to have my legs and be able to ride my bike wherever I damn well please. I learned shortly after it happened that one of the other occupants of the vehicle had severe spinal injuries, the full extent of which I do not know.

Still, a moment of pause.

 

[Puddles]

Dad: Why have those pies got letters on them
Me: So I can tell what they are in the freezer
Dad: So BA is Blackberry & Apple
Me: Yep
Dad: Whats "W" then or is it "M"
Me: It is a "W" it is Raspberry Pie
Dad: Eh?
Me: I could not find my "R" cutter... so thought I would remember "W" for Waspberry
Dad: So "SW" is Strawberry and Whubarb then?
Me: Yep... you are getting the idea!

 

[marknotgeorge]

Cortana: What's your message?
Me: Righto
C: Right home. Send or start again?
M: Start again
C: What's your message?
M: Righto
C: Bryce Home. Send or start again?
M: Start again
C: What's your message?
M: Ok