FNRttC Friday Night Ride to the Coast - Southend-on-Sea September 13th

[Aperitif]

Yes. Mark is good company. Throws the occasional tantrum (or wheel) but is (or will be if he absorbed the Whitstable Testament as described en route to Southend) classic TEC material.
And he knows Marilyn.

 

[Aperitif]

Shame you had to eat all that crap though..what is that, a free clock with every 'Super-Size me' meal?

 

[StuAff]

The BIg Yellow Bubble.
As Donald Rumsfeld and others might have remarked...'Need to Know'. I have discovered this video of your rucksack fabricator.*

*Colour may vary.

 

[redfalo]

Blimey, this ride was much harder than I expected. Partly because of the weather, partly because I did not get the clothing right.

I've rarely seen so much water on the streets in London than on my approach to HPC. The rain was just horrendous. When Dellers, after his safety talk, asked if there were any further questions, I was tempted to shout: “WHY???” Knowing that there is no satisfying answer, I restrained.

The schlep out of London was uneventful (and, as DZ already mentioned, amazingly quite and focused) – apart from a brawl between some drunken teens in Stratfort, which Ian heroically tried to pacify (it then turned out that the fighting parties were too drunk they could neither fight nor walk properly).

The next noteworthy thing happened in Brentwood. The main group left instantly when we tail end charlies arrived. My fellow TEC's decided to have a small breather. While I was doing improtant things that involved hiding behind a flower box, all the sudden Charlie arrived at Brentwood, which let my heart sank: Did we violate our tail end duties and forgot about collecting the waymarkers? I later learned that Charlie took a wrong turn in Brentwood.

I was struggling in the first hour after the halfway stop - mainly because I was too lightly dressed, shivering an starting to get really tired. Some liquids I happened to carry in my hipflask helped me over that nadir.

I was very impressed by Tim Hall's collection of spares. Shortly after the halfway stop, a poor chap smashed this chain. “I have some chain links”, I proudly announced. “So do I”, replied Tim and asked the rider: “How many gears do you have?” He was on 9 speed, while I only carried 10-speed links. Tim hat 8, 9 and 10 on offer. (I'm quite sure he also carried the springs I need to for servicing my Campy gear shifter...)

At home, I had two ours of sleep before my wife dragged me into the afternoon performance of “Much ado about nothing” in the Old Vic. While I struggled to follow the plot (thanks God there is Wikipedia), I swear I did not fell asleep like the chap in the row behind us, who was snoring impressivel.

It was good to see that the Rose is open again, The halfway stop was fabulous as ever, and it was really good to catch up with Teef and Tim, who I hadn't seen for a while.

All in all, it was a stunning experience, once again.


P.S.: If anyone has a convincing answer on the “W” question, please don't hesitate to come forward.

 

[mark st1]

Shame you had to eat all that crap though..what is that, a free clock with every 'Super-Size me' meal?

I was weak and needed to take the taste of the fried egg away. Was bloomin nice though

 

[jonny jeez]

Wow what a beast of a ride ! Left my towers in to an absolute soaking and ran in to Steve Jones at the local train station after several window knocking minutes jumped on the train. At every stop a sly peer out the doors could see it was still battering it down so no surprise on exiting Paddington to buckets of the wet stuff. After avoiding the barriers in HPC (stay tuned.....) pitched up at HPC and shuffled under the arch and awaited the off. Had previously offered to TEC for this ride and have to say enjoyed it alot more as it was taken at a more steady pace. I got wet very wet but i was still pretty warm so not all bad settled in to an uneventful ride out of London until we whitnessed a few punchy yocals kicking off and then stood well back when the Chelsea Head hunter Ian dropped his bike and joined in broke it up. It seemed to me to be quite a way in until the first stoppage for fixings, i was sent on ahead to inform the shivering wayfinders they were about to get colder and wetter ! Got to the ford and the rain had eased off a fair bit and i have to admit i was salivating at the thought of the Tulleys pucker rolls . Had a snooze and then spent a fair bit of time hanging around the toilets drying off.

Ventured back outside and the combination of tiredness and semi wet clothes seemed to make it darn cold hey ho back to it no sooner had we started and the lost chain happened couldn't first time i had witnessed these fettlers in full swing and it was soon back together. The next few miles seem to go pretty quick and it even started getting a little brighter. Arriving in Southend to 4 punctures in 200 yards i have to admit i was on the hunt for brekkie and some feeling in my fingers by then so apart from trying to destroy someones front wheel from a great height i left it to Martin to flex his muscle. Follwed Tim to The Rose and wolfed down a Full English in record time then after meeting the legend that is User13710 set off with the legend that is the smrbth. I have to say these few Band of Brothers are animals within 5 miles of leaving there was a sizable gap appearing between them and i .

I could tell it was just a gentle jaunt for them as i was blowing out of my behind they sloped of in to a gas station and waited for me to catch up it was then after deciding that even taking it down a notch was still way out of my league so Ross kindly destroyed his Saturday morning by dragging my sizeable behind all the way back to Dartford cant thank you enough Ross very kind of you i would have been a gibbering wreck otherwise. We parted at Dartford and i ventured into the unknown of getting my own way back to Paddington. It was pretty straight forward amongst the rain and aching limbs I managed to avoid the A13 until a small section which i ventured onto and then picked up CS3 back towards the big bad city. For those that dont know i was trying to complete my first 100 miler so i was on the verge of tears when at 83 miles around Barking way my Garmin flashed up low battery this did help a bit as it made me get a bit of a shift on and had an uneventful trip back towards Trafalgar Square via the A13 St Pauls and The Walkie Talkie etc. I got to the entrance of Birdcage Walk and it proudly said CLOSED so braved The Strand and up past The Ritz heading back to the sanctuary Hyde Park which was shut for a "cycle event" bloddy cyclists lol. Braved Park Lane and the crazy coach drivers and rolled into Paddington at 12.30 ish and i was absolutely beat.

Highs of the ride hearing Ian's music tales and his long CV of legendary bands good and bad. Aperitif's company and character assessments and seeing the gorgeous Marilyn Monroe (she did look colder than me though )

Lows most of the weather holding back and breaking up the smrbth and the pain .

Oh and my Garmin managed to hold out to Paddington...............................



101.30 miles thanks to all who helped me out much appreciated

Mi Mark, Nice riding with you. Don't be too hard on yourself we weren't that far in front of you...In fact once I'd taught Ian how to fix my puncture properly ... you were upon us. Brilliant effort, good on ya!

 

[Wobblers]

I knew we were in for trouble when I stepped off the train at Marylebone and bumped into srw and rvw who were managing a credible impression of drowned rats! Looking out the station entrance proved my worst soggy fears. I hadn't managed to get much sleep the night before, and had been feeling decidedly sub-par all day, I should have taken the hint. But I remembered Aperitif's marathon grimfest cycling in the rain to Cardiff for last year's Wales FNRttC posting the comment

The rain was falling like hard pencils (it wasn't 2B) so wet it was. No problem though as it stopped 14 hours later.

With that for inspiration, bailing out would have been churlish.

I soon got my answer. Already decidedly soggy at HPC, Long Martin pointed out I had a puncture. "But it's a ****ing Marathon, how can it have a ****ing puncture??" But I'd noticed the tyre had been a little softer than expected when I got off the train, it had to have happened on my way to the station in Brum, it had to be slow. I gambled - if I topped it with air regularly I should be fine and get to fix it in the dry at my leisure. Right? Well, almost. This slow puncture decided to promote itself to fast puncture on that fateful path into Southend, so I almost got away with it...

Low-lights: somewhere in East London, battling into an unexpected headwind with a facefull of heavy rain, already cold and wet, and getting wetter and colder, with cold sodden hands and even colder sodden feet. And knowing we faced some hours of this without respite. Davy, having to bail out at the start. Long Martin, bailing out - it's just rain, you big jessie, you can't go bragging about LEL if you get put off by a bit of rain you light weight!

HIgh-lights: waymarking at a junction, standing in a puddle (it wasn't as if I was going to get bloody wetter, was it??) when a voice spoke out of the darkness "Do you like standing in the rain, Andrew?" and realising it was Aperitif. Nice to see you, 'Teef, it's been far too long since you've been on a FNRttC. Getting to Stock, being able to dry out a little and being able to appreciate the marvel that is the Tulley family. Getting to Southend at last, with soggy feet and flat tyre but a genuine sense of achievement that we had all battled the elements and ourselves - and won.

I finally sorted out that troublesome rear tyre once we got to Fenchurch Street, ably assisted by Flying Dodo, who, as usual was the perfect gentleman. Thanks Adam! Then everyone buggered off home when I could have done with a beer or three, and with ages before my train. What to do? Find a 24 hour Tesco and dream of being in Cheltenham? No. I repaired to LMNH and fueled myself on coffee and cake. But at least I had the perfect book to pose with (have to fit in with the hip crowd, after all): Olaf Stapleton's Last and First Men. Actually managed to get quite far with it...

Now back home. With dry feet, at last. Bliss!

 

[mark st1]

Mi Mark, Nice riding with you. Don't be too hard on yourself we weren't that far in front of you...In fact once I'd taught Ian how to fix my puncture properly ... you were upon us. Brilliant effort, good on ya!

You to mate and i have to say what a stunning looking bike you have

 

[jonny jeez]

So here's a question. Other Than Charlie B and RB (who made a recommendation en route last night) who amongst us actually found their jackets kept them dry.

I really need to new a very waterproof jacket this week that can stand up to last nights rain. I know all jackets tend to leak somewhere buy can any of you suggest a good place to start.

Thanks for the company, it ended up being a great ride...once the rain stopped

 

[martint235]

Long Martin, bailing out - it's just rain, you big jessie, you can't go bragging about LEL if you get put off by a bit of rain you light weight!

I was wet by the time I got to the start. And miserable. I did helpfully point out that you had a puncture though.

And I can't help it that LEL is already on my palmares.

 

[mark st1]

So here's a question. Other Than Charlie B and RB (who made a recommendation en route last night) who amongst us actually found their jackets kept them dry.

I really need to new a very waterproof jacket this week that can stand up to last nights rain. I know all jackets tend to leak somewhere buy can any of you suggest a good place to start.

Thanks for the company, it ended up being a great ride...once the rain stopped

Altura NightVision had been up to yesterday flawless dont know if it was the amount of rain but it did start to leak front of me was fairly wet but could have been worse,arms were shite they were soaked. Apart from my jersey sticking out of the bottom which got wet the main part of my back stayed dry. Its nearly a year old so maybe i need to re waterproof. Warm jacket though which helped a lot.

 

[dellzeqq]

Blimey
The schlep out of London ...................

my work here is done...........

well, almost. 'Gordon Bennet!' would be the icing on the cake.

 

[Aperitif]

I'm doing 'forum name labels' for the next ride - so many people, and things to remember and I never pay attention.
One of the last 'Pre-Surrealist' rides of the FNRttC series...
Nice report Andrew - apropos our conversation regarding the streamlined look, this is not so much a bonus as one might imagine! You do go faster though - FACT - and it eliminates slow punctures in favour of fast ones.
The puddles were iced over this morning in suburbia - a reminder of sudden cold at this time of year.

Early Saturday morning along the way, it was cold. Forget 'taking stock'...leaving Stock is always bracing. I wore a vest, long sleeve FNR jersey a Montane (thin overjacket) and a 'Night Vision'. That's normally boil-in-the-baggery territory, but the rain and invasive wind + a bit of standing around meant I was cold. The Montane under NightVision trick is a good one-I was dry. Smelly maybe, but dry!
On return, as I arrived at Fenchurch St with an hour to 'kill', I can recommend the Gents toilets located in the downstairs concourse. Mr Dyson's finest hand dryers enable a thorough drying of Pearl Izumi wear, and it is easy to wheel a whole bicycle inside - with no plethora of double seal doors etc - 10/10! I wanted a photo of The Shard in cloud, so got that, and, just to show that this thread is not all about 'Mark St'...


And, given the rage for 'selfies' - here's one of Tim and self pausing at The Essex Stiletto Repository AKA Brentwood, before movin' on...towards "Tully's Teas" (Are you organising a 'collection' Simon - I am in for £5 to ameliorate their rain-affected income/effort?)

And, regarding the rain. Yeah, it's miserable, and all the dudes who want to show off their LEL shirts etc and burst with frustration 'cos they can't - don't worry. When we rolled along the approach to Southend (devoid of the whistling rigging this time...), I commented to Ian that it didn't matter about the rain, because it is all dispelled by 'arriving' and getting in safely, and having a laugh along the way. Oh, and it was a high tide too!
Cheers.

PS The distinct lack of hipflasks on this ride were a subject of much consternation to my friend Ian and I...in our moments of need, Olaf's Bowmore barely sated the desire. Let's not let this happen again, people!

 

[redfalo]

my work here is done...........

well, almost. 'Gordon Bennet!' would be the icing on the cake.

Oh, I definitely wouldn't say so. Never clocked the Gordon Bennet thing, for instance. There is still so much to learn....

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

PS The distinct lack of hipflasks on this ride were a subject of much consternation to my friend Ian and I...in our moments of need, Olaf's Bowmore barely sated the desire. Let's not let this happen again, people!

Well, a couple of us had a very pleasant surprise at the Russian breakfast table!