Does anyone else feel like a good cry ?

[postman]

My in laws live in a little village outside of Preston. During this lock down people in the village have been offering to help out. They are 83 and 89. It has taken us the family three weeks to get it in to their heads,accept help. People want to. So last week the village chemist delivered their medication and there is a lot of it. He popped it in to the unlocked porch along with four toilet rolls. He then stood back as f.i.l picked up the bag of pills. We did not order the toilet rolls. No someone has paid for four toilet rolls each old person in the village. How super is that. What a gesture.

 

[Levo-Lon]

No, I don't cry, it needs a very traumatic close to my heart event to make my eyes run.
Putting my dog to sleep was the last time in 2016

 

[oldwheels]

Not been out much in contact with others for a few weeks now but any I have come across are friendly and chatty at a distance. When I was a wheelchair pilot for my wife I found that people were generally very helpful so the attitude is not new but more noticeable now since everyone is involved apart from the usual selfish minority.

 

[mudsticks]

I consider myself fortunate to be able to cry about these things @Dave7, and all the other stuff that elicits emotions. Each of us is wired slightly differently, and have different upbringings and social mores. There is nothing wrong with you for feeling emotional about kindness. Just give the kindness back and remain compassionate. My tears today: opened a book at my desk and out popped a wonderful pencil sketch from a dear friend, of beautiful times long past. My tears yesterday: being deep in the woods with the dog and lying in the bluebells alone, completely enveloped by the land and sky. My tears tomorrow: another of @wafter ‘s bike reviews (only messing @wafter!)

It was the bluebells that set me off yesterday too.

Today it was thinking of a close old friend - whom i quite likely will never see again on this mortal coil - so i got a hug from a tree instead ---
-- "Full Hippy" alert

 

[NorthernDave]

Yes.

Isolation (and everything that comes with it) on top of everything else that's happened in the last 12 months is just what I didn't need.

 

[DaveReading]

From one of my favourite songs:

I've got something to say.
And I thought it might be worth a mention.
If you're not pissed off at the world.
Then you're just not paying attention.

 

[mudsticks]

From one of my favourite songs:

I've got something to say.
And I thought it might be worth a mention.
If you're not pissed off at the world.
Then you're just not paying attention.

Yup,

But the important trick is not to be pissed off with yourself for not being able to fix everything.

And maybe harder still..
Not to get too pissed off at the people, who don't seem to care about any of it..

Waste of time, and energy

 

[Julia9054]

I cry ridiculously easily.
Wish I didn't - it can be quite embarrassing sometimes.

 

[mudsticks]

I cry ridiculously easily.
Wish I didn't - it can be quite embarrassing sometimes.

Embarassing for you?
Or for other people?

I dunno - crying is just like laughing really - and nobody usually minds if someone laughs alot.

So what's the big problem with crying ??

I spose if people feel they should try to 'fix' your crying, that it becomes difficult.

We were often told off for doing it as kids I guess That's put some of us off.



-

 

[Julia9054]

Embarassing for you?
Or for other people?

I dunno - crying is just like laughing really - and nobody usually minds if someone laughs alot.

So what's the big problem with crying ??

I spose if people feel they should try to 'fix' your crying, that it becomes difficult.

We were often told off for doing it as kids I guess That's put some of us off.



-

Embarrassing for me. (And for my kids when I used to blub at school concerts! )
It makes me appear more emotional (and therefore, I guess, less rational) than I really am.

 

[Proto]

Yep, had a bit of a weep a few nights ago. Listening to the depressing news, two daughters working in Covid ICU, plus other things going on* in our lives, all got a bit too much. Wife and I had a bit of a hug and I shed a few tears. Better now.

*bought a house end of March, it's empty, but unable/unwilling to move, considered too risky. Desperate to move from this unlovely rented place.

What I haven’t said is what triggered it off. My two eldest daughters sent to the family WhatsApp group a video of one playing the piano and the other singing (badly) ‘Go Solo‘ by Tom Rosenthal. A lovely, moving, emotional song. It just sort of overwhelmed me. I love my four children dearly, haven’t seen them for weeks, and I fell over the edge. Cheered ourselves up last nigh5 with a Zoom Family Quiz Night! Worked really well. 😄

Regarding house move, we completed on the 27th March, but felt moving to a new house without any social support network a bit risky. The idea of contagion from removal men was high, too. So we‘ve waited a few weeks and are now in discussion with a local firm on how we can do it safely. Half our stuff is in storage, the other half with us here. So, we’ll move the storage stuff early May, leave it a week. Then move the stuff from here a week later. We won’t go with the removal men, stay isolated, spending at least three days in our camper van, then move down. All a bit of a hassle!



View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VePaI3jX4Sk

 

[mudsticks]

Embarrassing for me. (And for my kids when I used to blub at school concerts! )
It makes me appear more emotional (and therefore, I guess, less rational) than I really am.

I don't want to say 'Rubbish'.. @Julia9054

But that whole being emotional, makes you less rational nonsense is just that.

It's when people can't separate or understand the difference between emotion and rationality that the problems often arise.

People who confuse deeply felt emotions, with facts, are usually the problem.

They're the ones who deny their emotions, or the existence of them, or don't want to examine them.

And try to paint everything they 'feel' as some kind of 'rational' hard fact.

It's where a lot of the prejudice, and assumptions and 'stands to reason' type small mindedness comes from (imo)

Usually fear based - fear of the unknown usually.. But that fear or incomprehension, can't be admitted (that would be 'irrational') so it gets turned into anger / hatred.

Own and name your feelings, recognise them for what they are, then they become far less overwhelming

 

[mudsticks]

This is what set me off, two of my daughters (one of the Covid ICU, other is a police officer). I sort of fell apart


What I haven’t said is what triggered it off. My two eldest daughters sent to the family WhatsApp group a video of one Playing the piano and the other singing (badly) ‘Go Solo‘ by Tom Rosenthal. A lovely, moving, emotional song. It just sort of overwhelmed me. I love my four children dearly, haven’t seen them for weeks, and I fell over the edge.

Regarding house move, we completed on the 27th March, but felt moving to a new house without any social support network a bit risky. The idea of contagion from removal men was high, too. So we‘ve waited a few weeks and are now in discussion with a local firm on how we can do it safely. Half our stuff is in storage, the other half with us here. So, we’ll move the storage stuff early May, leave it a week. Then move the stuff from here a week later. We won’t go with the removal men, stay isolated, spending at least three days in our camper van, then move down. All a bit of a hassle!

But it's better than not seeing them at all right??

Both my sons live elsewhere.
The younger one only moved out a couple of weeks before lock down.

I've not visited his new place yet.

Be we had breakfast brunch together (with the older one too) on the houseparty app, and of course it's not the same, but better than nothing

 

[Andy in Germany]

I carry the Sensory Processing Sensitivity trait; never one to go for half measures I'm in the top 2% of this which means I pick up other people's emotions and start to feel them, not just empathise, although I do that as well, but actually feel their emotions as if I was in the same place.

This can be a right booger when watching a movie, I can tell you.

It is also one reason why I don't like going to the Theatre, even though I love working there: not only do I feel the emotions shown on stage, I also feel the reactions of the people around me and I get overwhelmed.

The problem is that all emotions are very intense as well, so I learned to keep a tight guard on them. I'll well up at all manner of inconvenient times otherwise which isn't generally very helpful when a client is pouring their heart out. On the other hand I can generally ask fairly exact questions of a client about their emotional state: some clients at my last job complained that I was able to read their mind.

 

[mudsticks]

I carry the Sensory Processing Sensitivity trait; never one to go for half measures I'm in the top 2% of this which means I pick up other people's emotions and start to feel them, not just empathise, although I do that as well, but actually feel their emotions as if I was in the same place.

This can be a right booger when watching a movie, I can tell you.

It is also one reason why I don't like going to the Theatre, even though I love working there: not only do I feel the emotions shown on stage, I also feel the reactions of the people around me and I get overwhelmed.

The problem is that all emotions are very intense as well, so I learned to keep a tight guard on them. I'll well up at all manner of inconvenient times otherwise which isn't generally very helpful when a client is pouring their heart out. On the other hand I can generally ask fairly exact questions of a client about their emotional state: some clients at my last job complained that I was able to read their mind.

I think I'm in a similar bracket, which used to get me into trouble with maintaining boundaries, with other people's feelings/ hurt.. Almost like I wanted to shoulder it myself.

But we have to discern between "My stuff / your stuff"

I also can't watch horror / torture / violence in films, or even read about them.
Cos it sticks in my head, along with the knowledge that someone somewhere, has been, or is going to go through that at some point. It's painful.

It's a tricky one to navigate.. Can be exhausting.
I'd imagine in your profession very much so.

You need alot of supervision to unload, I'd imagine.