Do or did your kids/grand kids believe in Father christmas?

[CanucksTraveller]

My daughter is ten and up until about now, she's always believed, she loves the idea.

Some of the other children in school have been telling her for a while now that he doesn't exist (which is a bit of a shame, albeit inevitable), and I think this year she's surely seeing for herself that he can't be a real thing. She herself sometimes points out some of the logic flaws, but she often makes up magical explanations so while I think she definitely knows deep down, she still hangs on to it.

Her Mum and I have talked and agreed it's likely not a healthy thing to believe in Father Christmas when you're in high school and it could potentially attract bullying. So with that coming up next year we're considering how we can reveal / confirm the truth gently. Shame, but it has to happen at some point. Bit like finding out that you were actually made by your parents doing really rude and sweaty things with each other, and not because a stork came after a "special hug". We all have to grow up at some point and learn about the reality of life.

It's nice that she's held on to this aspect for this long though.

 

[All uphill]

is this really the case?
You never ever believed?
I find this kind of/very odd to tell the truth - unless you had very particular parents.
It strikes me as kinda like bursting out of the womb and already knowing about sex/where you'd come from.
Some sort of devil spooky child.

That was the case for me, too. Never believed the stories I was told by preachers and teachers.

Long after my childhood I realised my parents didn't tell stories - we could always rely on what they said .

 

[Dave7]

is this really the case?
You never ever believed?
I find this kind of/very odd to tell the truth - unless you had very particular parents.
It strikes me as kinda like bursting out of the womb and already knowing about sex/where you'd come from.
Some sort of devil spooky child.

I did have, as you phrase it, "very particular" parents so was never brought up to believe in FC
Lets not make this personal

 

[Beebo]

My kids always believed up until about 8 or 9.
It’s quite magical to see them so excited.

 

[Blue Hills]

I did have, as you phrase it, "very particular" parents so was never brought up to believe in FC
Lets not make this personal

not trying to get personal dave but am just intrigued by the concept of "never believing".

Kids of course believe all sorts of stuff that isn't quite 100 per cent real - always seems to me that it develops the imagination. Sad indeed is a kid without imagination.

have a wonky memory but are you maybe the person from a somewhat religious background?

All the religious stuff I of course/naturally believed/accepted when young.
sunday school kid here.

 

[CanucksTraveller]

That was the case for me, too. Never believed the stories I was told by preachers and teachers.

Long after my childhood I realised my parents didn't tell stories - we could always rely on what they said .

I find that a strange way to look at it if I may be honest. Do you therefore believe that children that were brought up with a belief in Santa will then go on to develop a mistrust of their parents based on that?

Most parents tell half truths and legends at various stages of a child's development, to simplify and even enrich life for a younger mind, and of course later you talk about it in a more mature way when that young mind is better equipped to deal with the facts of life. I think most people agree that this didn't damage them or lead them to believe that their parents were liars, and not to be trusted.

How far do you take your maxim of "telling stories"? Were the "facts of life" explained in graphic detail to you by your parents at a very young age? Were you brutally honest about these things to your children? Or did you "lie" about it to some extent at least to wait for a better time in their development?

Not a criticism of you by the way, I'm genuinely just interested in this thought process.

 

[Illaveago]

I still do !

 

[Dave7]

not trying to get personal dave but am just intrigued by the concept of "never believing".

Kids of course believe all sorts of stuff that isn't quite 100 per cent real - always seems to me that it develops the imagination. Sad indeed is a kid without imagination.

have a wonky memory but are you maybe the person from a somewhat religious background?

All the religious stuff I of course/naturally believed/accepted when young.
sunday school kid here.

You are correct.....a very religious background.

 

[Illaveago]

Mind you ! He looks a bit surprised when I go and sit on his lap and tell him what I want for Christmas !

 

[Blue Hills]

seem to remember that i was told by a kid in the playground at the beginning of the second half of primary school and that I went home and asked my parents if it was true (ie not true) - I don't remember having any form of meltdown as a result even though as i recall I originally disbelieved that playmate's news that it was my parents.

 

[Brandane]

I distinctly remember being a believer, that Santa somehow came down the chimney with his sack of presents. At the age of 6, we moved to Jamaica and I remember Christmas 1968 being concerned about how Santa was going to get access to the house. No fire, no chimney! "He will just come in the door", I was told. Good enough. Can't remember what age I stopped believing. With 3 older brothers, it probably wasn't long after 1968 that I was told the truth, the b'stards .

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

I remember that a boy at school told us he wasn't real - I think I was about 7
My parents admitted it but it made no difference to Christmas day

My grandkids believe - although the 9 year old is having doubts and asked me in a roundabout way a few months ago
I made some no committal comment something like "Well if Santa is real and you stop believing then the presents could stop coming."

 

[BoldonLad]

.....

. We all have to grow up at some point and learn about the reality of life.

......

My youngest grandchild (5) is Downs Syndrome. She believes totally at present... and, is delightful... I often ponder how long it will be before some smartarse bursts her bubble

 

[Time Waster]

This was something we discussed as parents, and chose not to take this approach for our children. However ... we did tell them others might believe this. And my parents would talk about Father Christmas.

My now 17yo was fine, and aware that most in his class would believe it. My eldest, being autistic, just says what he thinks without knowing the consequences.

I wasn't really criticising just highlighting wider implications. It sounded and sounds like you've got a fair approach to such things. There's a few ASD people in our family and friends. Together with other so called disorders like adhd it's common to not have the right filters or even know there should be filters. Such things happen and kids move on quickly anyway.

It's possibly the adults who get more bothered when their child starts to question Santa claus. Kids just see it as a time to get presents from whoever gives them. I know I felt (feel) like that.

 

[ClichéGuevara]

My daughter was obviously having doubts, as she simply wouldn't tell me what she wanted, saying 'I know exactly what I want, but I want to see if Santa gets it right'.

With great effort, I managed to deduce what it was, and made sure the magic not only remained, but was reinforced. I'm a right soppy sod for a grinch.