Cycling tightwads

[domtyler]

Just wandering home from a friends house two streets away on Wednesday evening, I came across a perfectly good mountain bike tyre (not a lot of use to me) and a chain. Lots of bike detritus round and about this city.

On the same walk home we also found a hypothermic, very underweight hedgehog. Not cycling related at all, but as I seem to have taken on nursing this creature back to health before releasing it (having been to the vets with her and taken advice from a wildlife sanctuary), thought I'd mention it in passing.

Don't stamp on them if you're only wearing trainers.

 

[Maz]

I'm down there in a few days, Cab. I'll keep an eye out for a bloke with a hedgehog in one hand and a bike wheel in the other.

Re:Hedgehogs...I used to work with a bloke who was an SAS-survivalist-type nutter. Him and his mate ate campfire-roasted hedgehog during one of their 'missions'. Saddoes.

 

[Cab]

Watch out for fleas

The veterinary nurse had a good look for fleas. So did I. Neither of us could find any on her, not a trace. We think it most likely that the cold that nearly killed the hedgehog probably did for the fleas.

 

[Cab]

Re:Hedgehogs...I used to work with a bloke who was an SAS-survivalist-type nutter. Him and his mate ate campfire-roasted hedgehog during one of their 'missions'. Saddoes.

In principle, I see nothing wrong with that. Just like eating rabbit, hare, deer, squirrel, any other wild mammal. But all the same, it doesn't mean that I see any advantage in letting any one of those animals die of cold on the street. I quite like hedgehgs, they eat slugs and snails, so they're among the good guys as far as I'm concerned.

 

[Landslide]

I've been known to harvest fly-tipped parts of bicycles for spares. Is that wrong?

Not when it comes with a set of XT Thumbies!

 

[tdr1nka]

Apparently you wrap the Hedgehog in clay and bake it, that way when you remove the clay, the spines come out in the clay and 'Bravo!' a de-quilled meal for one.

Not quite my idea of lunch.

Oh and keep a couple of spines back, they make excellent toothpicks.

T x

 

[Cab]

Apparently you wrap the Hedgehog in clay and bake it, that way when you remove the clay, the spines come out in the clay and 'Bravo!' a de-quilled meal for one.

Not quite my idea of lunch.

Oh and keep a couple of spines back, they make excellent toothpicks.

T x

This one is really rather malnourished, so there wouldn't be any meat on her.

 

[dondare]

I once heard that hedgehogs produce so much anti-toxin that if you removed all the fleas and ticks from them they'd die from anti-toxin overdose.

 

[Cab]

I once heard that hedgehogs produce so much anti-toxin that if you removed all the fleas and ticks from them they'd die from anti-toxin overdose.

Naah, a vet will routinely treat them for fleas and ticks if they're brought in underweight or injured. Doesn't seem to do them any harm.

 

[HJ]

This one is really rather malnourished, so there wouldn't be any meat on her.

Keep feeding it and it will soon be big enough to bake

 

[bonj2]

LOL @ spindrift
definitely staying off my ignore list...

 

[Joe24]

Don't waste money on address books this Christmas!!

Simply get a telephone directory and cross out all the people you don't know!

 

[goo_mason]

Toothpaste squirted on a rubber band makes an ideal substitute for chewing gum.

Here are a few other handy money-saving tips:

An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.

Sweetcorn fans - save money on loo paper by simply pouring the stuff straight down the pan.

SAVE petrol by pushing your car to your destination. Invariably passers-by will think you've broken down and help.

OLD contact lenses make ideal 'portholes' for small model boats.

INCREASE the life of your carpets by rolling them up and keeping them in the garage.

TAKE your dustbin to the supermarket with you so that you can see which items you have recently run out of.

NO TIME for a bath? Wrap yourself in masking tape and remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.

EXPENSIVE hair gels are a con. Marmalade is a much cheaper alternative, but beware of bees in the summer.

Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whisky. The following morning you can create the effects of a hangover by drinking a thimble full of washing up liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall.

Make bathtimes as much fun for kiddies as a visit to the seaside by pouring a bucket of sand, a bag of salt and a dog turd into the bath.

Give up smoking by sticking one cigarette from each new pack up a fat friend's @rse, filter first, then replacing it in the box. The possibility of putting that one in your mouth will put you off smoking any of them.

(someone else who enjoys some of Viz's Top Tips )