CycleChat's cycling twonk of the year

[Joey Shabadoo]

I once cycled to work 12 miles at 5am in winter, through sleet, gales and hailstones using only my postie's torch for illumination to discover on arrival at the sorting office it was a Bank Holiday.

 

[RhythMick]

I fixed a puncture at home and rode to work across London. Carrying the bike up the stairs, the front wheel dropped off. I had forgotten to tighten the QR skewer.

I have one similar. Bought my shiny new Brompton from Evans, and my shiny new hub dynamo set. Quickly and easily installed at home. Only discovered while going over a bumpy footbridge over Exeter Quay that I hadn't tightened the front skewer - bits dropped in water. Fortunately not critical bits, had to make do with a nut and washers.

 

[RhythMick]

I once cycled to work 12 miles at 5am in winter, through sleet, gales and hailstones using only my postie's torch for illumination to discover on arrival at the sorting office it was a Bank Holiday.

That's a cracker.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

I drove a 100 miles to collect a bike and I hadn't got the key to unlock the roof mounted cycle rack with me. So 200 miles in total for feck all.

Fitting a new chain and forgetting to loop it through the rear derailleur, most folks have probably done that one.

 

[Mandragora]

Cheerily cycling the wrong way down a narrow street in the UK after four weeks cycling in France, and waving back at all the car drivers coming in the other direction who were waving at me in such an enthusiastic way.

 

[Cubist]

Only last Monday. I'd done a big ride in York the day before, and rather than stay and have Sunday dinner with the family at the MIL's I told them I had to be in for work at 7 the next day. I therefore drove home, snatched a sandwich and went to bed. Dragged my weary carcass out of bed at five the next morning and cycled to work. I walked into my office after a shower and change to find a colleague looking at me puzzled. "Thought I was covering earlies" he said. A quick check of the duties computer showed that I was scheduled to start at 3pm.

 

[Profpointy]

My claim to twonkness is almost slitting my wrist on the large chainwheel when loosening a stubborn pedal suddenly became un-stubborn.

Oh yes... there was blood.

I suspect we've all done that. And I suspect most of us thought "If that slips I'm going to cut myself on the chainring" just beforehand

 

[Idoru]

My latest claim to idiocy...

Thinking to myself "I'll get up early to ride in the morning as I'm working late a lot". So I dutifully got up and headed out of the door at sparrow fart. 10 minutes in I'm thinking "sheesh, I'm really not a morning person this is hard!". An hour of sweating and grunting later I freewheel to a stop and realise I hadn't freewheeled as far as I would have expected to... got off the bike and spotted that the rear brake had been rubbing from the start.

 

[Dan B]

First time I used clipless pedals I thought "I know, I'll leave the cleats loose on the shoes until I've worked out what angle they should be at". Had to take my shoes off to detach myself from the bike

 

[EltonFrog]

I think this twonk thread could run and run.

About fourteen years ago my wife bought me my first pair of spd pedals, and I fitted them to my Cannondale Jekyll 2000, I took them out for a test ride round the tracks of Richmond Park. All was going very well and as I approached a junction I saw a bloke having a break standing by a tree, he had exactly the same bike as me. So checking his bike out and acting all cool like, I came to a standstill ready to cross the junction. I forgot to take out my feet off the pedals, I went over like DelBoy through the bar hatch in OFAH. What a Twonker.

I got up dusted myself off like it happens all the time tried not to look embarrassed and rode off, my wife pissing herself laughing.

 

[_aD]

Many moons ago I was out with my cycling mate doing some local tracks and trails that we hadn't yet plumbed. After almost being thrown off my bike from a startled pheasant taking flight launching from the hedge next to me, we took a turn down a concrete road back to areas familiar. It was dusk and we'd decided to put on the lights once we reached the road. I was ahead by five seconds down the lovely long run and then suddenly noticed the gate across the road, whilst doing about 30mph. The steel gate across the concrete road at dusk*, which was practically invisible.

aD: Oh shiGATE!*CRASH*
Five seconds later...
Grah: Whatthegate*CRASH*

One of my reflectors broke off. How we didn't break our bikes and ourselves I'll never know. I hit that gate pretty hard and Grah joined me, quite literally.

We still get a good laugh from being gated :-)

* Yes, we had inadvertently detoured off public land, it seemed

 

[_aD]

I think this twonk thread could run and run.

If you insist...

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

First time I used clipless pedals I thought "I know, I'll leave the cleats loose on the shoes until I've worked out what angle they should be at". Had to take my shoes off to detach myself from the bike

Tee hee, a cleat variation is to engage the shoe to the cleats by hand to see how the mechanism works. Then you realise how hard it is to disengage a shoe from cleats. And you end up putting your shoes on again to get them off the bike.

 

[akb]

Not cycling related per se, but we have a pram for our 10 month old which uses a tube / tyre set up.

Tip of the day: clean the tyre wall before inflating. A '8' looks very similar at a glance to an '3'. Therefore getting pump happy with a track pump and inflating the tyre to 80 psi and not the recommended 30 psi results in an inquisitive call from the mrs, whilst shes halfway round a 2 mile dog walk with a completely shattered tyre! Oops! Was quite surprised she got that far tbh!

 

[roadrash]

bloody hell 18 likes for my twonk of the year post .... now to work out if thats a good thing or bad thing