Worst commentary ever

[Halfmanhalfbike]

Carlton and David yesterday on Ventoux.

NEVER MIND ABOUT HOW SEATS USED TO HAVE METAL RIVETS!!! TELL US THE NAME OF THE SAXOBANK RIDER WHOSE JUST GONE OFF THE FRONT !!!

YOU MUPPETS!

Sorry but I had to say it.

Time to retire Duffers

 

[Skip Madness]

From the Dauphiné thread:

That was a serious miscall by Carlton Kirby and David Duffield in the studio by saying that Szmyd stole it - Valverde was clearly waiting for Szmyd (who it did not look like was not dropped but appeared to jump a gear - EDIT: apparently he says he got nervous and cramped up a bit/felt sick) and they had agreed that Szmyd would take the stage in return for helping Valverde on the ascent. It's a common situation which the commentators should have recognised.

Kirby and Duffield are really pissing me off in this race, talking over one another, rambling about irrelevant stuff, getting things wrong. I know Duffield is a legend of sorts, but I just don't like either of them in this race, it's embarassing

 

[girofan]

But, but, but; so on and so forth! The wine was excellent, but Valverde is riding away, back to the start! I mean, sorry dear viewer what I meant was Valverde hasn't tasted the wine either at the start and I don't suppose he'll share a bottle with Szmyd anyway - - - - It's all too much Carlton!!! I'm falling off on the next corner, ramble, ramble, aaaaaaaaaghhhhh!!!! And here comes Skippy, I mean, Evans, or is it Lance Contador, aaaaaaagggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Skip Madness]

But, but, but; so on and so forth! The wine was excellent, but Valverde is riding away, back to the start! I mean, sorry dear viewer what I meant was Valverde hasn't tasted the wine either at the start and I don't suppose he'll share a bottle with Szmyd anyway

 

[roadiewill]

oh nd its vandevalverde for cas despan off the front

and the other day he got a bmc rider confused with a saxo bank rider :/

 

[Ludwig]

Your not insulting the legend that is Duffers. Shame on you.

 

[zimzum42]

Give me Ligget any day. I'd even go so far as to ask that Sean Kelly replace Duffers permanently, he's not much good, but he's way better than Duffers, who is an embarrassment

 

[girofan]

Killy to take my place? Well dear viewer the next thing you know they'll be connecting my mouth to a glass of Chablis, I mean, to my brain, (what's left of it)!
But so on and so forth, senile dementia is the new sensation from Spain and without the bugs, I mean, what do I mean? But, but, but, drugs he could be David Harmon in lycra drag?
Anyway when I rode the Square Wheeler's event in 1906 I rode a Philip's. Little did I know that 100 years later I'd be in charge! Some unkind soul said that's why they went bust in the 60's, but I put it down to Eddy. Eddy? Who's eddy David? And I'm hoping to try the filet mignon at Chez Elliot ce soir!!!!!!!!!!!
Swearing? Who's swearing? Not me I don't say naughty words Antony? Sean? David? Everythings gone black!!! He ho, back to the racing, but we're about to take an ad-break in twenty minutes so I'll shut up and let you take in the atmosphere.......My mouth has escaped.....someone catch it before it eats my brain.......Aaaagggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
See you at tommorrow's stage in??????????????????????????????

 

[Hont]

What race was he commentating on, as he seemed to pronounce it different each time? I swear at one point there were 15 words in the race title.

Duffers is a legend because he misses every bit of action in the race. Every single one; every break, crash, attack, sprint, everything. Legend. ;-)

 

[Dr Smut]

Duffers been especially bad of late, cant bear the thought of 3 weeks of that on the Tour. I think ITV4 have done a nice job with their current coverage, primarily the personable young chap who fronts it up, can we lobby for a transfer of personnel?!

 

[Hont]

He won't be doing the Tour - they'll have Harmon and Kelly.

 

[zimzum42]

He won't be doing the Tour - they'll have Harmon and Kelly.

Thank God for that. Perhaps Eurosport are finding a way of phasing him out.


Anyone who is into pro-cycling surely cannot be a fan, since anyone who is into it actually wants to know what's going on, not listen to someone ramble about wine and other rubbish whilst getting everything about the race wrong.

I reckon those who like Duffers only watch the TdF. They probably also ride a Thorn and associate LOOK cleats with the annual family skiing trip to Val d'Isere or wherever.

The only parallel I can draw with commentators in any other sport is maybe Blowers or Brian Johnston in the cricket. Their rambling was accepted because both actually know about the game and don't make mistakes all the time, and they don't get to ramble all day because they change the commentators around every 20 minutes or so.

Perhaps that's the solution? Let Duffers commentate on the first 20 minutes of the race, then let him **** off back to the pub.

 

[girofan]

Perhaps that's the solution? Let Duffers commentate on the first 20 minutes of the race, then let him **** off back to the pub.

Pub? Pub?

Bistro, if you don't mind?