Matthew Fort on pizza

[Chuffy]

He has this to say about Domino's:-
"Domino's: 1 star
Aside from a quiet whiff of drains when I opened the box, this was far from the worst "pizza" I had to eat. In fact it was not unpleasant, a cunning contrivance of an airy breaded base (air being the cheapest ingredient a food manufacturer can lay his hands on), a creamy goo of utterly tasteless non-specific cheese, and highly flavoured bits of sausage and other meats. This is not a pizza. It is something to put into your mouth, and as such it's not too bad, although I suspect that if you lived on such concoctions, your hair and teeth could fall out and you'd die. They include a small tub of "garlic and herb" dunkin' dip inserted into the lid for you to dip your remaining crust into, presumably as a way of showing up the superiority of what you've just eaten. I have rarely put anything so comprehensively disgusting in my mouth."

So now we know a little more about what Abitrary looks like. Balding, toothless and almost dead.

 

[dellzeqq]

I read this. Not up to his usual standard, but given the difference between the average English pizza and the Italian jobs, I think he just cut and run. A shame, because he's a great writer who seeks the good in things, rather than being clever.

(And, yes, I had a sneaky pizza last night, while the Babe was away. It was brilliant. )

 

[alecstilleyedye]

pure snobbery, imho. the dominos in macclesfield is the best pizza delivery in town (topped only by pizza express, who don't deliver), the other local delivery companies are cheaper, but the pizzas aren't as nice. whoever expects a £13 takeaway pizza to compare to a pricy trattoria is missing the point, it's like expecting a big mac to taste as good as a steak at the local grill.

 

[zimzum42]

The mistake a lot of pizza places in the UK make is trying to cram too many toppings on

when you go to Italy or to any proper pizza place the max number of toppings you get aside from the tomato and cheese is two, maybe three at a push. Much better that way...

 

[zimzum42]

pure snobbery, imho. the dominos in macclesfield is the best pizza delivery in town (topped only by pizza express, who don't deliver), the other local delivery companies are cheaper, but the pizzas aren't as nice. whoever expects a £13 takeaway pizza to compare to a pricy trattoria is missing the point, it's like expecting a big mac to taste as good as a steak at the local grill.

There are some amazing pizza places in London where you can get a top notch pizza for £6 or so.....

 

[alecstilleyedye]

i'd agree that dominos is expensive, but for an evening in on front of the tv, hard to beat. the key is in the convenience. nobody orders take-away pizza because they think they're eating italiano…

 

[Melvil]

I like Matthew Fort and used to love his reviews in the Grauniad every saturday, even if they were a little london-centric for my liking. He's certainly head, shoulders, knees and toes above Matthew Norman, who writes sloppier, lazier restaurant reviews than any in any local rag I have every read.

However, what did he honestly expect? It's like a wine connoisseur drinking jacob's creek and not liking it, I mean, d'uh!

 

[yello]

A little predictable perhaps. The kind of review you anticipate of any fast food. Though at least he didn't get too wordy clever clever with it. I loathe those high and mighty displays of word smithery that are meant somehow to act as a juxtoposition... sorry, contrast to the item being reviewed - be it theatre, literature or food. It's simply the reviewer amusing themselves/ego w*nking/showing off and I find it tediously predictable.

Fortunately, this review did contain exactly the sort of writing I love...

I suspect that if you lived on such concoctions, your hair and teeth could fall out and you'd die.

...even though I could have personally done without "such concoctions". There's value in simplicity as there is value in a simple Domino's pizza.

 

[Twenty Inch]

pure snobbery, imho. the dominos in macclesfield is the best pizza delivery in town (topped only by pizza express, who don't deliver), the other local delivery companies are cheaper, but the pizzas aren't as nice. whoever expects a £13 takeaway pizza to compare to a pricy trattoria is missing the point, it's like expecting a big mac to taste as good as a steak at the local grill.

THAT's your problem.

 

[dellzeqq]

I've seen a pizza delivery moped crash, and come close to being hit by the little horrors but this takes the pizza delivery first prize...

One evening a small, unattended pickup truck used for pizza delivery rolled down the slope, crashed through the chain link fence gate and impacted the 18,000-gallon tank's piping. Because there was no breakaway joint in the piping and the excess flow valve was only screwed in a few threads, the impact pulled the excess flow valve completely out of the tank.

At that point liquid propane began to pour out of the tank and roll further downhill via a ravine toward the low-income housing. Eventually, the propane fog found an ignition source resulting in a very large deflagration and fire. During the course of the resulting fire a bobtail parked about 14 feet from the 18,000-gallon tank exploded. Amazingly, no one was seriously injured.

In the aerial photo above, the white 18,000 gallon tank is just northeast of center and the pizza parlor across the street is to the northeast of the tank.