hangover bed

[Abitrary]

I'm working on a design for the ultimate hangover bed that I'm going to go on dragon's den with.

It will based around a standard pine slat bed chassis, but with a motorised hood / dome that can be operated on hangover realisation. The chunderdome.

The dome will be completely soundproof and dark, although there will be an option for low lighting which will reveal a purple velvet interior to simulate a womb.

There will be three plastic feeding tubes which will supply:
-warm tomato soup
-flat coca cola
-fizzy water (preferably peligrino)

There will also be a little cupboard with some skips and pepperonis.

Because this is a sealed environment, there will obviously be aircon, but there will be an option to realise sleeping gas into the air, and a timer that will release wake up gas. If you've done something really stupid on a friday night this will give the option of 2 days stress free distance from the event.

For midweek usage there will be a phone with voice obfuscator that will lower your voice 2 octaves so you sound pretty sick on front of your boss.

 

[GentleBenn]

Brilliant !!

May i suggest adding oxygen cylinders, i think that's good for hangovers !

Good luck in the den,but get your figures right or they'll eat you alive .

 

[Abitrary]

Brilliant !!

May i suggest adding oxygen cylinders, i think that's good for hangovers !

Good luck in the den,but get your figures right or they'll eat you alive .

Thanks. Like I said there will be aircon. You could pump pure O2, but I'd for a normal air mix. I'd imagine using a very low ratio of sleeping gas in this - a weak anaesthetic.

 

[jonesy]

Thanks. Like I said there will be aircon. You could pump pure O2, but I'd for a normal air mix. I'd imagine using a very low ratio of sleeping gas in this - a weak anaesthetic.

Pure O2 plus flatulance!

 

[Abitrary]

Pure O2 plus flatulance!

All hygiene matters would be taken care off. There would be a single flap/vacuum tube at the edge for any/all effluence.

 

[Noodley]

Er, what about the Irn Bru and cold pizza?

 

[Abitrary]

Er, what about the Irn Bru and cold pizza?

You can substitute the coke for Irn Bru for coke, if you can stomach it.

There will be limited space of solid food, however. If you can eat large food then you don't have enough of a hangover to warrant using this machine.

I also forgot the saline drip machine for reyhdration. A bit like the doctors in holby city use if they have to do an op after a drink.

 

[ACS]

somewhere to put your beer goggles and a trap for the gorilla who follows you home, throws your togs about eats half your donna etc, etc

First aid kit for when you wake up and have to chew your arm off to get away from the reality of the situation and lastly, a demijohn of Boots Kaolin and Morphine Mixture to quell the after effects of the double vindaloo with added 'loo'

all part of the recovery process.

 

[sheddy]

Welcome to the Chunderdome!

 

[GentleBenn]

What about a TV with a selection of your favourite movies, and "ahem" maybe some adult movies !

 

[Chuffy]

Holder for the leftover half kebab. I like the two day distance from embarrassing event feature, although if I'd had one in my student days I'd still be asleep now...

 

[snorri]

Perhaps an Andrews Liver Salt dispenser instead of the hot tomato soup?

 

[Abitrary]

What about a TV with a selection of your favourite movies, and "ahem" maybe some adult movies !

I think you may be missing the point. The chunderdome is a serious piece of kit like a kidney dialysis machine: only for extreme situations.

If you have the ability to completely enjoy porn, then you don't have a proper hangover. Or at least you will weaken yourself even further and wish you didn't, like spending your last penny.

 

[Cubist]

If you have the ability to completely enjoy porn, then you don't have a proper hangover. Or at least you will weaken yourself even further and wish you didn't, like spending your last penny.

+1 You can't pull the Pope's cap off with a real hangover and even if the headaches don't actually kill you, it'll simply end up as one of those tugs of war which never seem to get anywhere.......

 

[Abitrary]

Not just that, but you'll have to do it again straight away the minute you feel OK just to set the account right.